Under the knife

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I've looked it up before.

I've heard the stories.

I know what's going to happen.

I'm just not prepared.

There's no way in hell that I'm going to be put to sleep.

I've read those horror stories of people feeling all the pain and not being able to say anything.

People get put to sleep and they don't wake up.

I'm not ready.

But yet, here I am laying on the operating table, trying to think of all the possibilities I could get out of this.

I could throw a tantrum?
Eh, too childish.

Maybe a crying fit that leads to me hyperventilating?
No, that might result in them still putting me to sleep and might lead to intubation. Yeah, not gonna do that.

Try to run away?
I'm hooked up to too many random machines to try that.

Maybe just express my concerns to my super hot surgeon?
Definitely not.

I guess I'm just doomed.

I've run out of options.

There's nothing I can do it.

"Earth to little red? Auburn, are you there?"

I looked over to see the hot Dr. Hemmings in his scrubs, face mask, and pizza scrub cap, trying to catch my attention.

I might've been too focused on getting out of this.

"Um, Dr. Hemmings, I think I have to pee." I said, trying to come up with something, just anything.

"That's because you have a catheter, you don't actually have to pee." He explained, giving me a smirk in response to my little "oh".

"Well I uh, um, I'm so thirsty. I'm parched like the desert." I ranted out, ignoring the fact that my IV was connected to a bag of fluids.

"Are you trying to stall, Auburn?" He asked me.

"Whattt? No? What's stalling? Can you explain it, please?" I pleaded.

"Auburn, you're just going to take a quick little nap and wake right back up. There's nothing to it. You have the easiest part." He explained, while I just gave him a sarcastic look.

"I'm serious. Look my buddy Calum here, is just going to place this mask over your face..."

I felt the mask come over my face.

I couldn't do it.

I can't do it.

"No!" I yelled turning my head away from the mask. I would've hit it out of the way, if my hands weren't strapped securely on the table.

"Auburn, hey little red. It's alright. Relax. Breath in and out." Dr. Hemmings described as he came very close to my face.

"What's wrong? It's just a little nap, no biggie." He explained.

But I didn't say anything, I wasn't going to tell him I was scared.

"I can assure you, that you are in the best hands. I will be right next to you when you wake up." He said, trying to convince me.

"Explain before anything happens." I begged.

"Okay. That's a start, so Calum behind you has a mask that he will put over your face to breath into, that's the anesthesia. Then, he will push some medicine into your IV at the same time, that's the general anesthetic. And then you'll just take a little nap and then wake up and I'll be sitting right next to you, waiting for you to wake up. Do you think you can handle that?" He explained softly.

I slowly and cautiously nodded my head.

I was as ready as I'll ever be.

"Alright, we're going to start now." Dr. Hemmings cautiously suggested as I saw Calum move to put the mask over my face.

"Just breath, little red." Dr. Hemmings reminded.

I was trying not to fight it.

It was just a nap.

I just need to breath and be put to sleep and it will all be okay.

I closed my eyes, and slowly and deeply breathed in and out.

"There you go, Auburn. Take a little nap, I'll see you when you wake up." I heard Dr. Hemmings say.

But little did he know, I was right.

Some people just don't wake up.

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