You and Me, Forever

Secrecy

Disclaimer: THIS DOES NOT BELONG TO ME.

This is a converted imagine off of Tumblr. All credit goes to owner/ writer.

This da link of the original imagine:   https://hopefullymendes.tumblr.com/post/156673947523/secrecy

***

Camila's POV

There are many reasons why Shawn and I are keeping our relationship completely hidden from the rest of the world. One of them being that his management team don't think it's a good time to start any drama in his fanbase because it's in the middle of his Illuminate World Tour promotions. That leads to another reason, which I am most fearful for, which is the response from both Shawn's fans and the rest of the media that we will surely receive - I don't know if I can handle that yet. The last reason being that Shawn keeps saying that he doesn't want me to get hurt but if I'm being honest, it almost hurts more having to hide it. I'd want to yell it from the top of a mountain, that I belong to Shawn and he belongs to me. I hate having to meet him places or having to go somewhere far enough away from any possible crowds. I want to act normal with him in public. I know it's not that easy, I just wish it was.

Shawn is busy on the couch, strumming away on his guitar, playing whatever comes to his mind. I walk over to him and slide my hands down his chest, leaning my head on his shoulder. "What's wrong babe?" He asks me, his strumming stopping immediately. I swear he can tell my current state just by the way I breathe. "I've just been thinking. About how much it sucks that we're a secret. I mean our relationship doesn't need to involve anyone else's views or opinions, obviously, but I hate being scared that someone is going to find out." I nuzzle my head closer to Shawn's neck as he sighs. He grabs my hand and guides me to the front of the couch, placing his guitar beside him. He pulls me to straddle him, my arms wrapped around the back of his neck, our faces close. "I know. I'm so sorry, Camila. It's so hard. You know I only want what's best for you though, don't you?" He questions, sounding a little concerned. "Of course. No, I know it's not your fault, Shawn." I rest my forehead on his. I fight back the tears that are threatening to escape my eyes. Shawn places his soft thumb on my cheek and wipes away a tear before kissing the spot gently. As he pulls away, I place my lips on his and kiss him as if it's the last time I'll ever be able to hold him, to taste him. As our mouths depart, we are both desperate and filled with lust and sorrow. "I'm sorry. I have to go now, babe. I have another meeting. I'll come back here later though, okay?" Shawn says, gently lifting me off him and onto the couch. I nod my head as I hug my knees, watching my beautiful human leave me. He turns around before reaching the door which I receive as an invitation to run up and jump into his arms. I bury my face into his neck as his strong arms embrace me. I place my feet back on the ground and step back, allowing Shawn to leave. We don't say anything more, we just exchange glances before he walks out the door. My apartment is quite well hidden from the busy streets so it's less worrying for Shawn to come to my place instead of his. I hate this, I hate this so much. I don't want to be someone's little secret, I want to be someone's lover.

About an hour has passed and all I've accomplished is to tidy my apartment and make myself a cup of tea. My phone begins to vibrate, making my heart flutter as I see the name on the screen. "Hey!" I say, my tone of voice awfully happy. "Hi. Camila, can you promise you'll stay inside? Someone leaked a photo of me leaving your apartment just before and there is a multitude of people currently outside your apartment according to twitter." I stay silent as I stare blankly at my window, making sure I'm standing far from it. "Oh my god Shawn..." I begin. "No, Camila, it's okay. Please don't freak out, it's fine, I promise. You'll be fine, I just need you to stay inside." My breathing quickens despite Shawn telling me to stay calm. The thought of so many people in want of my attention, standing outside my apartment is awfully frightening. "Camila?" Says Shawn who also sounds more than slightly worried. "Mhm. Yep. I'm fine." I say, not wanting him to have to worry about me any more than he already is. "I promise you I'll sort this out. Camila, I love you." He says in a calmer voice. I realize it's also the first time he's ever said those three words to me while he's been in the presence of someone else. That in itself soothes me a little. "I love you too." I reply before Shawn hangs up.

I decide that logging onto twitter might be a good idea. I look through Shawn's twitter and see the spam of tweets coming through as people try to puzzle this together. A mystery they should leave unsolved. There are photos of my street, of my gate... and one of Shawn and I inside a restaurant sitting incredibly close. I immediately slam my laptop shut, the fear rushing back to me as I wonder just how many people have actually seen us together and taken photos. My phone buzzes and is in my hand straight away. A tweet from Shawn reads: "Haha, you all need to chill. No girlfriend for me, just a friend's house. Please respect my privacy guys!". My heart isn't mending at all, the cracks are slowly being tormented the further I dig into the situation. "Why does this have to be so hard!?" I yell, throwing my phone across the room, incredibly frustrated and hurt and longing for Shawn to hold me. My door opens, making me jump and my heart almost leap out of my chest. "I'm sorry! It's okay, you're fine, Camila, it's fine." Shawn says, immediately holding me tightly, making me feel safe again. "How..." I begin, fumbling with my words, my mind still in a fuzz from being so frightened. "I got my security onto it. Everyone cleared out about 15 minutes ago so I just caught a taxi here to be less obvious. I knew you needed me, you're safe now." He says, holding me even closer. "And I also spoke to my management team and we're in the clear." I look up at Shawn, his perfect smile on display. "You mean..." I don't even have to finish my sentence, knowing exactly what he means. I don't have to be a secret anymore.