You and Me, Forever

I Don't Think So

ꫝડꪀꫝꪶ𝕥ꪶρ𝕫ꪑ

He's never home. He's always busy. He never answers the phone.

He hasn't seen Camila in months.

Camila can't do it anymore. As much as she tries to convince herself that he can make time for her, that he tries to talk to her when he can, she is starting to think otherwise.

Camila can't handle pretending that she isn't upset that he isn't here. Can't handle the fact that all her girlfriends are getting married and having children. That they are living with their boyfriends or husbands, and get to see each other everyday. That when she's invited to a party she has to attend solo. That she is the only one in the office that didn't bring a plus one to the office party.

Camila's typing up her text before she can really think about what she's doing.

Shawn,

I hate to do this over text, but considering you never answer mine anymore I'm sure you won't get this until later. I can't do this Shawn, I can't do this long distance anymore. I need a break. I need a break from it all. I love you.

But I'm done.

Goodbye Shawn.

And she's clicking send as the first set of tears are rolling down her face. Camila can't sit here and wonder if he's read it, if he's gonna respond. So she sets her phone off to the side and gets up to make herself a cup of coffee.

𝖍𝖘

Her phone is buzzing, he's calling.

Camila let's it go to voicemail.

When he calls again, and again, and another 15 times she cries harder.

Camila finally answers when she can't handle his ringtone anymore.

"Stop calling me Shawn." Camila sobs.

"Camila! What is going on? Honey what are you saying?" He says urgently.

"Shawn, please stop calling me." Is all Camila says before she hangs up. He calls again and then she blocks his number.

She's hurt, hurt that this is what it's come to. Camila is so utterly in love with him.

Now Andrew is calling. But she doesn't answer, knowing it's probably Shawn.

But he texts.

Camila? Why is Shawn freaking out?

He calls again.

"Andrew." Camila answers, another sob.

"Camila? What's going on? Why am I watching your boyfriend break down? I have never seen him cry, and now I am. What's going on?"

"He's not my boyfriend." Camila says quietly.

"Excuse me?" He chokes out.

"He's not my boyfriend, it's over."

"What happened?"

"I can't anymore Andrew, I can't." Camila chokes on her cries.

"Oh dear." Andrew says softly.

"Who is that? Is that Camila? Let me talk to her." Shawn shouts in the background.

"Don't do it Andrew."

"Andrew let me talk to my girlfriend. Do you hear that? You! Are! My! Girlfriend!" Shawn shouts.

Camila hangs up and turns her phone off completely. She walks to her room and crawls into bed, crying until she falls asleep.

𝖍𝖘

It's been two days now. Camila hasn't left her bed unless she has too. But it's Sunday and 11 am and she wants to just stay in bed until work tomorrow, which she is thinking about calling out of.

But there is this excessive banging rapping on her door.

Camila crawls out of bed, moping her way to the door. She unlocks it slowly and wipes her eye as she opens the door. She's looking at her feet, sniffling. All she can hear is his heavy breathing and someone else sniffling.

Camila looks up and her eyes widen as she sees who is standing in front of her.

His eyes are red and puffy, his hair is messed up, he's in old ratty sweats and sweatshirt.

"What are you doing here?"

"What am I doing here?" He asks, voice rough. "My girlfriend won't answer her phone, to anyone. She sent me this weird, fucked up message, and is scaring me." He says, and Camila can see the acne on his face, the dried tears on his cheeks.

"Shawn." Camila sighs.

"No, what the fuck? You can't just send me a message telling me that you can't do this anymore, that you're done. And then not answer the phone. Camila, what's going on? Talk to me." He says taking her hands.

"Shawn we're never together anymore, you are never home. I can't sit here at home, waiting for you. You don't even respond to my messages."

"I know, I fucked up. I can't lose you, I am so in love with you."

"I love you too."

"Then why are you trying to leave, why are you giving up on this?"

"I'm not giving up, I tried! Shawn I tried! Unlike you."

"I'm home now." He says looking down. Ashamed of his past actions.

"What?" Camila croaks.

"I'm home, took a leave. I'll go back when I'm ready."

"No Shawn don't do that." Camila starts to protest.

"No, you can try your damnedest. Do it, try to fight me off, try to throw this away. But I'm not gonna let you. So I am gonna stay here, with you, and I am going to fight for us. Fight for you." He says walking past her to the inside of her apartment.

"Really?" Camila says with a small smile.

"Really! You are mine, and I'm not letting you go."

"Kiss me."

"What?" He turns in shock.

"I'm telling you to kiss me." Camila says closing the door. He rushes to her and attacks her lips with his. And that's all she needs, she knows he cares. That he needs her as much as she needs him.

"Please don't do this, please." He says, pulling away, holding her face in his hands.

"I'm sorry." Camila closes her eyes. He sighs and kisses her forehead.

"Please Camila, don't do this. I need you so much and you mean so much to me." He says not understanding her context.

"No Shawn," Camila opens her eyes. "I'm sorry I tried to break up with you. I just had this notion that you didn't want me anymore, didn't need me anymore. It was hurting me to be with you and think that you thought that."

"Never, I'd never think like that. You are mine, my person. My girl, you are my girl." He says pulling her close.

"I know that now, I know that. I think I just needed reassurance that you still want me."

"I'm always gonna want you, and I thought I was making that clear. But I know now that I've got to tell you all the time, which I am perfectly fine with. I wanted to tell you that every morning but didn't want to annoy you."

"I don't think I could ever be annoyed with that."

"Good, because now I know that. I'm gonna be loving you all the time." He smirks and kisses Camila again.

"That's all I need Shawn. I just need your love."

"And you've always had it, you'll always have it. I promise you that."

ꫝડꪀꫝꪶ𝕥ꪶρ𝕫ꪑ