IDINAS POV
Once we get into the car I turn on the music. I know Kristin want to talk but I don't feel like talking. From the corner from my eye I can see her looking down on her phone. She probably got the hint. I will tell her eventually, but now is just not the right moment. I'm exhausted. Tired from the show, but also tired because I haven't slept for more than 5 hours in the past 3 days. "your place?" Kristin looks up from her phone and nods. I can see that she is tired to, but i also know that she is gonna get a boost of energy later this evening. The short car ride is silence but not akward. After a few minutes I drive my car into the parkingspot in front of Kristin her appartment. We get out of the car and I follow her as she walks into the building locking my car behind me. We take the elevator to the 10th floor and Kristin opens the door into her cosy appartment. I chuckle when Thunder sprints past Kristin to greet me causing her to roll her eyes. "Hi to you to human that pays literally all of you food" she mumbles under her breath making me chuckle even more. I stand up and make my way over to the slightly frustrated blonde. "Thunder told me to get you this" I say before leaning in to peck her lips. I can feel her lips form into a smile before kissing me back. After we break our kiss she turns around to the kitchen. "What do you want to eat?" her voice is coming out of the kitchen. Before I even have the chance to answer she starts speaking again "Can we order in? I'm in the mood for sushi" her head comes around the corner to see my reaction. I simply nod making her squeak in happiness. She graps her Phone and gets back into the kitchen. After a few minutes she comes back to the diner to randomly peck me on the cheek. I smile at her randomly outburst of happiness as I watch her pour some soda into two glasses. "here you go" she hands me one of the two glasses. "Thank you my love" I smile making her cheeks burn up again. I don't want to ruin this ambience to talk about me, but she deserves to know.
KRISTINS POV
After finishing diner we sat down on my couch. Idina has been quiet ever since the show. And to be honest the way she looked this morning was not very pleasing to me. Something was up to her but I knew she was more likely to talk when I didn't push. I take sip from my wine watching the brunette laying next to me scrolling through her phone. Her head is rested on my legs and her free hand is petting Thunder who is curled up on her legs. I stroke my hand through her hair as I stare at the blank wall in front of me. The ambience in the livingroom is quiet and nice. I let out a sigh making Idina look up from her phone. "nothings wrong haha" I chuckle when I meet her confused eyes. She smiles and lays down again. "How did you feel being back at the theatre today?" it's me breaking the nice ambience in the room. She murmers something under her breath and sits up again. "say that again" she smiles and locks her hands into mine. "It was nice. Nice to be back" I feel like she is on the egde of telling more so I keep silent. "I need to tell you something" her voice is soft but not unaudible. I just nod as a sign that it's okay for her to go on. "I haven't been totally honest with you the past 3 days" my hearts starts beating faster as she speaks out the words. I know she is refering to the fact that she promised to call me everyday and she did but she might have been lieing to me. "Okay, but do you want to tell me now?" is my somewhat direct response. She nods but she refused to make eye contact. "I've been sleeping bad, like really bad. I took my medicine and I tried journalling but nothing is working. Except.." she paused and I give her hand a little squeeze to convice her to continue. She is twiddling her finger tops against eachother making me extreamly nervous. "except from what dee" I speak with some slight temper but not in a bad way. "Except from you" her voice almost fades away speaking those three words but I heard them loud and clear. "I need you Kris, the past few day of having you sleeping next to me made me forget the pain. You stopped my brain from repeating the event. You cuddled next to me made me feel loved" I can't help but smile as I caress my thumb up and down the back of her hand. "But I don't want you to feel like you're tied to me, because I feel bad. I don't want you.." I can sense that she is gonna ramble about some lame excuses so I cut her off. "Don't even start with naming excuses. I love you and I would do everything to keep you safe and healthy. And seeing you this morning looking more dead that alive broke my heart. And you telling me off because I was being worried didn't make it better" I give her a little squeeze before continuing. "Look I really don't like the fact that you've been lieing to me eventhough it was through a phone. But I love and trust you. So I believe you must have had a good reason to lie to me. Okay so let's drop that." She just nods in agreement. "I'm very proud of you for writing down your feelings and I want you to keep doing that. But I also want you to know that I'm always here okay, you don't have to hide anything. About the medicine, we can go to the pharmacy to get some stronger once because they will help you eventually. I can come with you if you want?" She nods again. "that would be nice, thank you" she smiles. "You don't have to feel like a morron because you sleep better with someone next to you. I get that dee, really. You just got out of a toxic relation, with a difficult divorce and then the other thing happened. You have a lot to progress. And I am here for that okay. That's what you do for someone you love. That's what I want to do for you. So don't feel guilty for wanting someone to hold you, just tell me because I love holding you. I love being with you. I just love you." her cheeks blush up and my heart is beating way more fast than normal. "You can stay here tonight. I have a oversides shirt in my closest so you won't have to be naked in front of me again" I wink at her refering to earlier in her dressingroom making her cheeks turn even more red than they already were. "Let's get you to bed, because you have some sleep to catch up with" I get up from the couch pulling Idina with my in the movement causing Thunder to jump of her lab. I take her by the hand and make my way to my bedroom. I toss the oversized shirt towards her and get myself into my own pyjama. After finishing my nightroutine I find Idina already under the blankets. Her eyes follow me around the room before getting myself in bed next to her. She moves herself closer to me and lets out a small yawn. I turn of the lights before cuddling closer to her and pressing a light kiss on the top her head. "thank you" her voice sounds drowsy and she is trying her best to keep her eyes open. "It's okay, you can go sleep. I'm with you" is all I say while stroking through her brown hair. "We can't live together we're not there yet" I chuckle at her sleepy brain blurring out these random thoughts. "It's okay dee, we'll figure something out. Tomorrow okay, you need to sleep" she nods peacefully before closing her eyes snuggling herself deeper into my arms. I give her one last kiss in her hair before letting out a relieved sigh. I look down at the woman in my arms. She is safe and she is in my arms. With that thought I give in to my own tiredness and I wander off to sleep.
Hi loves,
How are you all doing? How are you holding up?
I really want to thank you all for the lovely feedback y'all keep giving me. My heart is overloaded<3
Here is a new chapter! I hope you like it
xo mel
YOU ARE READING
You Learn To Live Without || Chenzel Story
Fanfiction||🇬🇧 ⚢|| "You wake up everyday feeling sorry for what you've done. You wake up knowing she will never love you the way you love her. You try to smile but it hurts. Yes it hurts, but you go on. Just because, she is there right in front of you. You...