Be Mine

38

"Ma'am? Ma'am Lia?"

Lia only noticed that her attention was being called when her assistant, Diane, switched off the mixer. She looked at the bowl and saw that the cream is now overmixed and has turned into butter. She sighs.

"Ma'am, are you okay? Kami na lang po dito if you are not feeling well."

She looked at Diane and felt sorry for what happened. "I'm so sorry, Diane. I will just be in my office.", she apologized and left the kitchen. She headed to her office and let herself lie down on the couch. She fished out her phone, but still no texts or calls from Caloy. It's been two whole days since they argued, and she feels guilty. She wanted to call him and even tried to send him a message but every time she attempts to do so, she backs out as she really doesn't know what to tell him.

She misses him and this is what she is afraid of. She is getting used to his presence that it makes things hard for her. Her mind kept telling her to be cautious and not attach herself, but of course she did the opposite. Now, she is starting to fall, and she doesn't know if Caloy is still willing to catch her if she really does.

She is staring at the ceiling when Bianca entered her office. She felt her sit down on the solo chair, near her and sensed Bianca staring.

"Say it, Bianca. Start the sermon na.", she says. She told Bianca what happened because she knows she's been distracted at the café. Her best friend caught her giving wrong orders and putting salt instead of sugar in one of the cupcakes.

"Mars, kung ako sa'yo, kausapin mo na kasi si Caloy."

She really wants to. But she is afraid. Her anxiety is taking over and she can't deal with it. "What will I say?"

"Mag-sorry ka na kasi... nasaktan mo yung tao eh."

"I know. But what if he doesn't accept it and he doesn't like me anymore? Wala na ata akong mukhang mahaharap sa kanya."

Bianca sighs, "Imposible yang sinasabi mo. Patay na patay sayo yung tao!"

"Well that was before I said hurtful words at him. Before I shouted at him. God, I'm so stupid."

She really felt like an idiot when Caloy left her unit. She wanted to follow him but her feet felt like it was just glued to the floor and she couldn't move at all.

"Alam mo, hindi rin kita masisisi sa nangyari dahil sabi mo nga masakit na yung ulo mo tapos tinaasan ka na rin niya ng boses, kilala rin naman kita, nadala ka lang ng emotions mo. Pero kasi naman, bakit mo kailangan puntahan si Gary mag-isa? Tamar in naman yung sinabi ni Caloy sayo na paano kung napahamak ka?"

She heaved a deep sigh. She regretted helping Gary that night. She helped because who else would anyway? She thought about it and maybe she should've called for a back-up person that night to help her. And Bianca is right, her emotions took over during the fight with Caloy. She wasn't able to think well that morning and now she is disappointed with everything she said at Caloy.

"What will I do now?", she asks Bianca.

"What if puntahan mo siya ngayon? Bring lunch or snacks?"

"In his office?", she asks.

"Unless alam mo kung saan siya nakatira."

"No, I don't." She just realized that. She's never been to his place, so she doesn't know where he exactly lives. He just mentioned that he stays in the same city.

"Sa office mo na puntahan para sweet.", chimes Bianca.

"Okay lang kaya yun? I mean Gary's there."