a loving pain | spencer reid. ✓

thirty <3

*spence's pov*

I storm out of mine and Y/N's hotel room, trying to make sense of what happened.

She fucking cheated on you with your bestfriend. I think to myself, over and over again.

I walk around the hotel for thirty minutes, trying to figure out what happened. I quickly pull out my phone, going to messages and typing rapidly on the keyboard before sending a text.

Me : Hey. Are you awake? Can we please talk?

Jennifer Jaraeu : I'm awake. What's up?

Me : It's hard to explain over text and I need a place to stay for the night. Can I come to your hotel room?

Jennifer Jaraeu : Yeah sure. I'm in hotel room 57C. I'll let you in when you get here : )

I click the power button on my phone before shoving it in my pocket.

I walk to JJ's room, knocking on the door three times.

"Hey." She says with a smile, swinging open the door, "Come on in."

"Hey. Thank You for this." I say back walking in and closing the door behind me.

She gestures me to sit on the bed as she sits down next to me.

"What's going on?" She asks.

"Y/N cheated on me..." I say, shaking my head and staring down at my Converse.

JJ's jaw drops, "Spence I- With who?"

"Morgan..." I say as a tear rolls down my cheek, "She cheated on me with my bestfriend. And she didn't even bother to fucking tell me! Instead she made my Dilaudid addiction the main issue of the relationship." I yell.

"Spence..." JJ says, as I cut her off.

"I should've known! I expected it! I should've known they were lying when I asked. Morgan wanted Y/N first. She's such a whore. Who the fuck cheats on someone!?" I yell, angrily getting up off the bed, pacing around the room.

"Spence! Don't call her that!" JJ exclaims.

"No Jennifer. I will call her that because that's what she does! Who the hell makes out with their boyfriend's bestfriend and then makes them seem like the bad guy!?" I exclaim.

"If I were in her shoes, I would've down the exact same thing!" JJ says.

"What the hell!? Your fucking defending her!?" I exclaim.

"Yes! You have constantly been acting out since she has been back. She nearly fucking left the BAU because of you. Ever since we saved her from her abduction with Gideon, you have been manipulating her and mentally abusing her." JJ yells, standing up in anger.

What the hell is she talking about?

"Mentally abusing her!? Manipulating her!? What the hell are you talking about??" I exclaim.

"See! You were so hopped up on Dilaudid that you don't even fucking realize what you have been doing to her! The entire time that you were high, Morgan was taking care of her. Telling her that you were just having a bad day. It took an emotional toll on her! You fucked her up! And here you are again, causing more and more problems in the relationship!" JJ says.

I shake my head in disbelief.

"Y/N is so fucking in love with you... She loves you so much that she's been by your side since the start. While you were smiling with Morgan at bars after your breakup, she was crying across the room, watching you laugh. You have absolutely no right to call her a whore when your the one who fucked her up." JJ says.

I shake my head, storming out of JJ's room as well.

Jennifer Jaraeu : I don't care how mad you get at me for calling you out, but you should know that I'm right. Y/N didn't deserve that.

I leave JJ on read, shaking my head at the text. I walk out of the hotel, getting in a cab and driving straight to the airport.

I get an immediate one-way plane ticket to Quantico, Virginia as I pull out my phone to text Hotch.

Me : Hey. I know it's super late, but I won't be on the Jet. I just got a plane ticket, I'll be flying back to Quantico on my own.

Aaron Hotchner : Okay. Is everything okay Reid?

Me : Yeah. I just need to clear my head right now and get back to Quantico early.

I shut my phone off, going to wait for my flight at the gate.

-time lapse : back in quantico-

I land in Quantico, driving home from the airport, straight home. I live in the same house as Y/N, so it'll be difficult to avoid her, but I'll figure something out. As I get inside of the house, I unlock my phone to see missed calls and texts from Y/N along with a few texts from Morgan.

Derek Morgan : Reid I promise it's not what it looks like.

Derek Morgan : We were both drunk, we couldn't control it.

Derek Morgan : Pretty Boy, please talk to me.

Derek Morgan : Your my bestfriend. I would never purposely steal your girl.

I ignore Morgan's texts, going to check what messages Y/N sent me.

Y/N L/N : Spence please talk to me.

Y/N L/N : Spence, it was just one drunken mistake.

Y/N L/N : Please talk to me.

Y/N L/N : Please don't do this...

Please don't do this. The words burn into the back of my mind. I quickly whip out my phone, going to my contacts and dialing Y/N's number.

"Spence! Oh thank God!" She says on the other line as she picks up.

"Hey..." I say, subtly.

"It was a mistake. It was one drunken mistake." She says.

"Yeah Pretty Boy, don't do this." I hear Morgan say on the other line.

"Don't do this? Your telling me not to do this? And what were you guys thinking when you were shoving your tongues down each other's throats?" I ask angrily.

"Reid! Don't say that! It was a drunken mistake!" Morgan says defensively.

"Exactly. This was all a huge fucking mistake. Y/N and I were a mistake." I say.

"Spence!" Y/N exclaims.

"What!?" I yell.

"You think our relationship was a mistake?" I hear her ask, as her voice cracks. I could feel her heart shatter through the phone.

I feel instant regret to what I said. Automatically, I go to apologize and take back what I said. I really love Y/N, I do. I'm just struggling to manage my feelings right now.

"Y/N..." I pause, "That's not what I meant, I swear!" I say solemnly.

"No. You know what, your right." I hear her let out a sob, "This needs to stop. We're toxic. We are in a toxic relationship Spence! Something happens and we find each other to blame instead of talking it out. We need to end this." She says.

"Y/N wait..." I say as she cuts me off.

"We need to break up. Go see other people. Good night Spencer." She says with a sob, hanging up the phone.

The dial tone clicks as tears roll down my cheek. I move my phone away from my ear, chucking my phone on my bed in front of me.

We're over. We're actually over. Damn it!