Secrets In The Sunset | KTH 18+ ✔️

Chapter Sixty-Eight

As soon as my front door is opened, I slide out of my heels immediately and grab them off of the floor on my way to the bedroom. Taking my shoes off at the front door is still a habit of mine. While I won't go to the lengths to do it at other people's homes, I still won't wear shoes in my own. Even the friends that come over know that their shoes must be kicked off at the front door. Yes, it stems from my time living with Uncle Kim and Taehyung, but it's also just much easier to keep my apartment clean.

Knowing I have to just bite the bullet and spill the details, I decide to give Madison a call before Ethan gets here. It'll already be awkward enough being put on the spot to answer question after question. There's no need to make it worse by waiting until he's around to hear me talk about it, too.

"Hello? Oh my God. Hold on! Let me go in the other room." Madison excitedly answers the phone before I even have a chance to say anything. "Okay, okay, okay. Tell me please!"

"You're acting like you're in high school again." I giggle.

"Shut up and tell me. What was the kiss like? Is he a good kisser? How do you feel about it?" She begins to ramble.

After walking back into the living room and lighting the scented candles on the coffee table, I plop down on the couch with my legs curled underneath me and grab one of the accent pillows to snuggle in my lap. The warm vanilla scent slowly begins to feel the room and wash a wave of calmness over me as I get ready to put it out in the universe that I have been with someone other than Taehyung for the first time in my life.

"He's a very good kisser. It was sweet and timid at first, but then got a bit more passionate, but that's really my fault." I reply.

"How do you feel about it?" She asks a bit more cautiously knowing how I've been about Taehyung over the last almost half a decade.

"I felt fine about the kiss actually. It was the sex that took a while for me to get comfortable with."

Madison gasps and then squeals a little bit as I hear her flop back onto her bed. "I knew it! I could tell by how you two were acting so different today! Okay, okay...whew! Okay so how how do you feel about the sex?"

I take a deep breath and really think it through. That's one thing about Madison, she won't let me bottle things up. She'll make me face them head on. But I mean, sure, it was good. Very enjoyable actually, but I'd be lying if it didn't feel a bit strange still. My heart is still attached to my first love.

"He was very patient and understanding with me about it all. Able to empathize about where I was at mentally and emotionally and he helped me through that. I'm very thankful to him for that. After the fourth time..."

"The fourth time?!" She gasped with surprise in her diction.

I roll my eyes and laugh, "After the fourth time, it was much easier. You know he's a good guy so I'm glad it was him if it was going to be anyone else."

"So you're okay? Do you think you could see yourself with him?" She questions.

See myself with him? Beyond just sex, but in an actual relationship? I guess I could. We are friends after all and what are couples if not friends who have a deeper love between one another? I think the real question is, could I see myself falling in love with him?

I think about his kind heart and his feelings towards me. I think about all of the years he stuck by my side without pressuring me, wiped my tears, celebrated with me and helped me grow into the adult I am today. All while appreciating me for who I am. I think about how he knew about me painting when I'm stressed without me even having to tell him. He knows me. He knows all of me if I really think about it. And there's only one other man in this world that knows me that well. But would I be able to love more than one man?