21. It's Not Worth The Price I've Paid

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"Dude, get off me!" I slur, trying to push this gross guy off me.

He has me pinned to the wall in the upstairs bathroom. Oh god, please don't let him do anything to me!

"P-Please, get off!" I cry out, sobering up.

His warm hand slips over my mouth, silencing my fearful words, as his other hand begins pulling my pants down my legs.

Embarrassment fills me. Anyone could come up here and find us.

"So sexy" His slurred words cut through my skin like a razor.

I shake my head, trying to push him off my shaking body.

"Get a fucking hold of yourself, Gerard. You're not a little kid anymore. You need to learn to silently obey."

Bile rises as I close my eyes, feeling the sick touches of this random idiot, and Father John. Oh god, please take me away. Wash me in the blood.

"Fuckin' slut." He spits, moving his hand into my underwear and making me involuntary shudder.

If it wasn't for the fuzzy feeling the alcohol has given me, I'd probably be a mess of tears and sobs.

As I feel myself going hard, I notice his jeans growing tight.

Fuck.

Fuck, fuck, fucking fat fuck.

Fucking fuck.

Shit, fuck, shitty fucking fuck.

"Gonna use you up, whore." He spits, gripping me tight and moving his hand faster.

"F-Fuck" is all I managed to say before the door swings open.

Oh, thank you Lord!

"F-Frank!" I scream through the rough hand against my mouth.

Frank stands in shock. He looks beyond pissed off. He is ready to kill.

"Dude, fuck off." The guy pinning me to the wall slurs.

In one fluid motion, Frank grips the guy's shoulders, pulling him to the ground.

"GET THE FUCK OFF MY MAN!" Frank's voice tears through the small bathroom.

I watch as he moves to straddle the guy, beginning to lay punches into the guys face.

"F-Frank"

He ignores me, seeing red.

What do I do? He is gonna kill the bastard!

"Frankie, l-let's just go!"

"Shut the fuck up Gerard!" He screams, not caring to ease up as blood coats the guys face.

I shake, flashbacks burning all around me.

"Get up!" Father John pulls me to my trembling feet.

I shake as he begins undressing me.

"Such a good boy" He smiles as I try to drown out the touches.

"My little slut"

"FRANK!" I scream as loud as I can.

To say Frank was shocked out of his rage, would be an understatement.

"Gee?" He shakes his head, looking back at the mess he made.

"Get the fuck off him. I-I need a drink." I stutter as his face shows sorrow.

He get's up, moving to the sink and beginning to wash the blood off his fist.

"You okay?" He asks.

I shake my head, "No. B-But I will be when I-I have a few drinks."

Frank's worried eyes fall on me.

"Baby, you shouldn't use the alcohol as a coping mechanism. That's how people become alcoholics." He says as my eyebrows furrow.

I begin moving to the open door.

"I'd rather be an alcoholic than some object guys can fuck." I spit, leaving a shocked Frank in the bathroom.

I need to get out of my head.

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