TaeKook [One Shots]

#104: TaeKook; No Return

Photo credits to @/hisasihun in twt.

We have changed.

Then and now had been too drastic. A change that I can never really accept. Way too forward yet incomprehensible. Too detrimental yet I keep on taking it in me, in my system, and the way that I think, 'Ah, the world, my world innovated'. No. Innovation is not a word to show my regret on what we have become.

You were smiling all along and was telling me you love me every single moment I can put my finger on. You were glowing and was blooming with love as you stare at me morning to night. I have seen the shiniest stars I could ever see in you eyes as your pupils dilate with love. Love that was only for me and was mine. Love that we shared but turned upside down.

It was a U-turn with no return. As if you've forgotten all our plans for the future and looked back at the past which was dark and in ruins. Pulling it back to the present with saying "Remember when you..."

Supposedly sweet if only that you brought back memories such as "When you first kissed me?” or "When we went to Busan to meet my Family?”

Jeongguk, it was supposed to be sweet. But you spoke in displeased delight. You spoke in anger. You spoke in hurtful hatred. You spoke "Remember when you cheated?” and added "Remember when I forgave you?" And ended "I shouldn't have done it, Tae"

That night I wanted to shout back at you. I wanted to cry out my pain and disappointment. I wanted to release my frustration and tell you: "I was sorry and I am still sorry"

But then I came to realize there is no point. No point in shouting back. No point in crying to beg. No point in telling you how much I love you and how much I am hurting. No point in trying to talk it out.

"You never really loved someone until you learn yo forgive," -Ben&Ben, Leaves

All I did is reach for your face and connected our foreheads, closing my eyes as I spoke the last few words I never wanted to say to you. "Let's end this,"

So that night, though my heart is heavy and my eyes wanted to flow out so much tears, I tried to stop. I tried to suppress my pain just until I drove you back to your place. And you didn't say anything. All you left me was a kiss on the cheek as if telling me that it is an end note. A final end mark.

Done.

And you left the car without taking anything from me nor letting me give you anything.

Done.