Afraid

23.

A lot of you guys are confused about chapter 21, so let me clarify the situation. She gave Zayn a hand job. Later that night, Zayn had Dessert (if you know what I mean) 😉 Alex is still a Virgin. Okay carry on

Songs for this chapter: anything sad.

Alex's POV

I woke up next to a very sleepy Sammy, she was moving around taking all the blankets. I groaned sitting up, I looked up searching for Pookie. Her little bed was empty. I panicked a little as I stood up only to realize I was wearing a oversized t-shirt and undies. I quickly slipped on some volleyball shorts. I went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and pee. I put my hair in a quick bun, then headed downstairs. I heard my dad laughing from afar. What time was it?

I walk to the living room, "Have you seen Pookie?" I ask. He looks at me smiling holding her up. Thank god he had her. I sit down on the opposite couch watching him play with her. He adores her like Zayn does. And to think my father didn't want a pet, he likes Pookie. I hear someone in the kitchen moving plates. "Who is here?" I ask

My dad tickles Pookie, "Your mom silly, "Let's eat. Go wake up Sammy." My mom? She usually sleeps in till noon. The sky is a light gray, it must be morning still.
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When breakfast was over, My mom and dad went to their friends house. Sammy and I stayed to clean. The backyard was trashed. Cups everywhere, silly string on the tables, chairs. The food tables had half eaten pizza, chips scattered along the table. I rolled my eyes, "This is going to take ages!" Last night was really nice. Zayn stayed till 2am, his dad came by too. My dad and Yaser got along so easily. Sarah was nice, I love her soft accent. Everybody went home around 3am, it was New Years everybody wanted to party. I just wanted sleep wrapped in Zayn's arms. I grew to love his warmth around me. Heaven was sleeping in his arms, and hell was sleeping alone.

Sammy laughs knocking me out of my thoughts, "Suck it up buttercup." We start cleaning the food table first, then pick up the cups on the floor. Usually I would protest about cleaning up, but I wanted to bring Pookie out here and have her explore her new home. Everybody yesterday just fell in love with her. My mom and dad knew about it, Zayn sent pictures to them asking which one was cute.

"So yesterday after Martin and I went outside to eat. What happen between you and Zayn?" She asks throwing the cups in the trash bag.

I bend down picking up cans, "Just the same crap. Fighting and more fighting. Something changed in him. I feel more..." I don't know exactly how to explain it. The feeling is new. "It's completely useless to me. He needs to get over the fact that Martin is my friend. He doesn't have a problem with Charlie, or Liam and Niall." Harry and Louis are gay, so they don't count. He acts like all the guys want me. They don't! Nobody wants a boring girl, they want fun. Although, I love to party, and I am fun, I'm just more tamed. I'm not easy, I have standards, and somehow Zayn passes them. He knows what he wants from life, to be successful. I know Zayn can do it too. I have faith in him.

"Maybe Martin talked to him." Sammy suggests

I grab the beer bottles, "He doesn't even like my friend Ryan." Seriously what is with guys possessing over girls. We aren't like that?

"Yikes. Have you told him that your leaving soon? Back to America."

My heart sinks. "No. I don't want to say bye to him. But I can't put my life on hold for him or any boy." In movies, girls always choose the boys. I mean seriously stop that crap! Education is more important than boys.

"You're right but Alex you need to tell him before the time comes. You only have a couple of more months. Then you're leaving. Also are you going tonight to the party?" Sammy is right. But of course, I'll come back and visit my mom and dad. Zayn also said, he wants me in his life as a friend if anything ever happens. Maybe it's for the best. I'm not complaining though, it's my life. My decisions, Zayn can't make those. And yes, I am. I miss my friends from Manchester.