Crossed | Tokyo Ghoul x Vampire Knight

[58] Awake

I wake up slowly, very slowly. I blink a few times as I try to collect myself and figure out where I am. I look around the room, glancing back and forth. I'm in my dorm. I look to the window, the curtains are closed but sunlight is shining through the gaps. It's either still day or I've slept for twenty-four hours.

I try to lift myself from the bed to get up but I'm held down by something. I lift my doona slowly, looking down to my waist which is being held down by something heavy. An arm is wrapped around my tightly, holding me close to the person it belongs to.

I turn slowly, half expecting it to be Shiki and that he crawled into my bed during the night while I slept. But instead, I set my eyes on Ayato, who is fast asleep with his face buried into my pillow. I smile lightly at him, turning around in his arms so I can face him.

Everything slowly starts to trickle back to me as I lay there in my own thoughts. Akara coming back with Ayato, Yagari fighting with me.

Yagari ratting me out.

I gulp loudly, suddenly being filled with anxiousness as everything hits me at once. I lean into my pillow and stare at Ayato's sleeping face, my mind going slightly numb. As soon as I got close to Zero, close enough that I thought I could tell him, Yagari comes forth and ruins the plans.

Possibly ruining all chance of me ever having any type of friendship with Zero in the future. Not to mention all of this happened in front of my boyfriend that only just found out I am in fact alive and not dead. I frown as I think of this. Here I am trying to keep myself safe and I never thought for a second what Ayato would think happened to me.

I always just thought he would assume I ran off on him or disappeared for my own good. It didn't even cross my mind that he could think the worst. I've caused more damage to Ayato then I have prevented. And Zero, I've caused him a hell of a lot of confusion at this point.

Well not all me, if I was the one to tell him he wouldn't be confused because I would have done it in a civilised way and explained why I kept it from him and Akara for so long, I knew if I explained it right they would understand. Yet, when Yagari and I are just screaming and throwing punches I highly doubt anyone got any useful information out of what we were saying.

I'm sure Zero has some idea since he has been rattling around my brain for the last few weeks, but everyone else is going to be at rock bottom. Scraping at the bottom of the barrel for any answer from anyone. Oh, here the rumours come.

I curse under my breath, guilt ripping at my heart. How could I let this happen? How could I let both worlds fall apart so quickly and not be able to do anything but make it worse? Kami Niko, you are spending all your time trying to prove how strong you are, yet here you are just laying in bed and getting emotional when everyone around you deserves an explanation for what is going on.

I reach a hand up, brushing Ayato's bangs out of his face and watching his features carefully. I missed him and the moments like this where we just lay in bed and enjoy each other's company. I brush the hair away again, bringing my hair tie off my wrist and try to tie his hair up so it's out of the way.

This time it wakes him up. He groans slightly as he wakes, opening his eyes slowly and slowly moving his face further out of my pillow. He opens his eyes slowly, blinking at my chin before trailing his eyes up to mine. I smile at him softly, my eyes closing slightly as I do.

He reaches up and touches the little doo I have made out of his hair and gives me his 'are you serious?' look like every other time I have done it. I just keep smiling at him, hoping he isn't absolutely pissed at me for my part in the recent events. Like he reads my mind, he raises his hand from my waist and flicks my forehead lightly, making me shift my head back.