81: Paresis

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In medicine, paresis (/pəˈriːsɪs, ˈpærəsɪs/) is a condition typified by a weakness of voluntary movement, or by partial loss of voluntary movement or by impaired movement. When used without qualifiers, it usually refers to the limbs, but it can also be used to describe the muscles of the eyes (ophthalmoparesis), the stomach (gastroparesis), and also the vocal cords (Vocal cord paresis). Neurologists use the term paresis to describe weakness, and plegia to describe paralysis in which all voluntary movement is lost. The term paresis comes from the Ancient Greek: πάρεσις 'letting go' from παρίημι 'to let go, to let fall'.

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I felt the weakness of my fingers on my left hand and my left forearm in the middle of the surgery. I am right handed, I do know that naturally my left hand is less powerful than my right hand but not to this extent. It wasn't like this before. 

Kung neurosurgeon lang ako or vascular surgeon, I could've killed a patient with this less than nimble hand. 

"Ok ka lang doc?" My first assistant asked. 

"Yeah. Nakatulog ata tong mga daliri ko, parang nanghihina." I replied. "Tapusin na natin to. Gutom na ako." 

They chuckled before we continued with the emergency surgery. 

After two bags of blood and 7 hours of standing, natapos rin kami. I washed my hands and almost ran to the dressing room to get myself a glass of water from the dispenser. Uhaw na uhaw ako at gutom na gutom na rin dahil hindi man lang ako nakapag-lunch bago dumating ang pasyente kaninang alas onse.

Sana pala nag-early lunch na lang ako. It's 6 pm! Hindi rin ako nakapagbreakfast kaninang umaga dahil nagising akong masakit ang ulo. Sinadya kong hindi kumain dahil alam kong magsusuka ako kung sakaling kumain ako. 

I sat on the bench in the dressing room and downed the whole bottle of water, resting my tired legs and aching shoulders. Saka na lang ako nagbihis matapos ang sampung minutong pag-upo. 

I grudgingly walked towards my office with my white coat in my left hand. Wala na akong nakakasalubong sa hallway, malamang dahil sarado na rin ang outpatient area dahil anong oras na. 

Sinara ko ang pintuan ng opisina at nang lingunin ko ang mesa ko ay naroon ang ilang takeout box mula sa isang fastfood chain at isang plastic cup na malamang ay may iced tea. 

The swivel chair turned and revealed Terrence wearing casual clothes. Mukhang nakauwi na ito at bumalik lang sa ospital dahil naka-shirt na siya at cargo pants. 

"Heard you got into an emergency surgery this morning just before lunch. I figured you didn't get to eat at all before you went to the OR." Tumayo siya mula sa swivel chair at kinuha ang coat ko mula sa kamay ko. Nanatili lamang akong nakatayo at sinusundan siya ng tingin. 

"Why are you staring at me?" Tanong niya nang mapansin niyang nakatingin lang ako sa kanya. Hindi rin naman ako sumagot. 

"I know I'm handsome, babe. But don't stare, nakaka-asiwa." Nakita kong namumula ang mga tenga niya. Ang cute lang! Hindi nagba-blush ang pisngi niya pero yung tenga niya namumula! 

He chuckled and gave me a peck on the lips. "Come on, mag-dinner ka na. Mukhang nalipasan ka na ng gutom." He pulled my hand and made me sit on the visitor's chair. Umupo naman siya sa kabilang side ng mesa at pinanood lang akong kumain. 

"Are you feeling better now? Hindi ka na ba nagsusuka?" He asked as I ate my meal.

"Sometimes nagsusuka pa rin lalo na pag sumasakit ang ulo ko. My eyes are fine, hindi naman tumaas yung prescription ng mata ko." Kitang kita ko ang kinang sa mga mata niya. Alam ko ang pinupunto niya. Sooner or later alam kong magtatanong siya. 

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