The Wicked Doctor

55: Kubler-Ross Stages Of Grief

The Kubler-Ross Stages of Grief which is also known as the 5 stages of grief is a model consisting of the various levels or stages of emotions which are experienced by a person who is soon going to approach death or is a survivor of an intimate death. The 5 stages included in this model are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This model was introduced by and is named after Elisabeth Kubler-Ross in a book called ‘Death and Dying’ which came out in the year 1969. This book, as well as the model, was inspired by her association and work with patients who were terminally ill.

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Terrence

I held the object that reminded me of her the most and drank the whiskey directly from the bottle. It's been two years and I am still madly in love with her. Kahit anong ipilit kong ibaling kay Stacy ang attention ko, hindi pa rin mabura bura si Anrie sa sistema ko.

Muli kong isinuot ang kwintas ko kung saan ko inilagay ang engagement ring na dati kong ibinigay kay An. When she left, she left no trace of her except the ring she left inside her hospital locker.

It was like she already embedded herself in every fiber of my being. Every atom in my body screams love for the woman who took my heart when she left without any word. 

I sat on my chair facing my study table, staring at the photos my mother sent two weeks ago. I told my mother to stop giving me updates on Anrie a year ago and she obliged. But something must have happened for her to send me another envelope.

Akala ko ay nagsimula na akong makalimot pero hindi pala. Hindi totoo yung "out of sight out of mind". 

She was out of my sight but she was never out of my mind. She never escaped of my heart. She's still there, buried deep within. 

When I opened the envelope, my eyes saw red. I swear I wanted to kill the man she was dating. Their position was so intimate and there were even photos where they kissed and hugged. That was my place two years ago but I was stupid to waste that woman. 

Bumukas ang pintuan at iniluwa nito si Stacy na may hawak na isang maliit na envelope na kulay pink at may magandang palamuti. "What's that?"

"Jennifer's wedding. I think you know the groom." Iniabot niya ito sa akin at itinaas naman ang basong gamit ko saka uminom rin dito. "Terrence, it's noon time. It's too early for alcohol." 

Lumapit siya sa mesa at tinignan ang mga larawan na nakalatag lang sa ibabaw ng mesa. I didn't do anything at all to hide the photos from her. I just let her pick the photos one by one and look at each.

"Nah it's fine. I've got two days off, today and tomorrow. You know me, I just drink if I am sure I won't have any surgery or on call duty. Where's Hans?" 

"With the nanny. I need to go back to the hospital in an hour. Can you watch him for me?"

"Sure. I won't get drunk with just one bottle anyway." I chuckled and took the photos from her hand that seemed to have frozen in place. Kinuha ko ang mga ito sa kanya at tinapon sa pinakamalapit na basurahan bago lumabas ng study room. 

My phone started ringing on my way to the bathroom but I was not in the mood to answer it. I let it ring thinking that it was just one of the residents when I specifically told them not to call me. Nang mainis ako ay dinampot ko ito at nagtaka nang makita ko ang pangalan ni Gerald sa screen. 

This one hasn't been in touch lately so why call now? 

I placed the phone on the wall stand and started stripping off my clothes while the phone was on loudspeaker. Gerald invited me to his wedding and told me that the girl he would be marrying is Jennifer, a colleague of mine who turns out to be An's closest friend here in Oslo. She's probably the only one who knows where exactly she is right now. Alam nilang lahat, kasama na si Jennifer, na sinubukan ko na talagang kalimutan si An kaya hindi ko na rin inalam ang mga bagay tungkol sa kanya.