random a$s aot oneshots/headcannons

📓random things📓

this is random lol. idk why i laughed at the picture but ok

Eren: Randomly, one of you will get up and say let's go to the movies. So Eren will drive to the movie theater and watch whatever movies are on.

Levi: You'll sometimes find him on the balcony, just sitting there in silence. It's kind of creepy actually, but instead, you put on the 𝙹̶𝚎̶𝚊̶𝚗̶ horse mask and jumpscare him from behind.

Armin: You sometimes will buy the most random things on Amazon. When he questions you, you'll say 'well it's my money.' You bought a dildo on accident one time...but Armin threw it out when you were sleeping...

Jean: You'll play pranks on each other, one after the other. Whoever comes up with the worst prank has to run into Erwin's office and scream SHINZOUUU WO SASAGEYOOOO!!1!!!1!1!1. And then get yelled at by Erwin cause he was in a meeting with Pixis and Nile.

Mikasa: She steals a LOT of your clothes, so naturally, you steal her clothes to make up for yours. One time you found your favorite pair of pants hung on a tree branch. 

Hanji: Well...there's quite a bit of weird things that happen around the Survey Corps base. Hanji decided to try a love spell on everybody so they would be attracted to you, though they thought it didn't work. Well it did. Levi actually blushed over you, which was a strange sight.

Erwin: One time you both got super drunk because of the mad scientist Hanji. Did you fuck? No. Did you fall asleep and snore loudly? No. You screamed the lyrics of every Frozen song until you both had sore throats in the morning. 

Ymir: You, Historia, and Ymir decided to try painting a little bit. So you bought canvases, paint, and paintbrushes. After about forty-five minutes, Ymir pridefully holds up her canvas. "Look at that, I painted a cock going into a pussy." She says in a boastful tone. 

Mike: One time, you both were very bored. There was just nothing at all to do. So after about 30 minutes of silence, Mike stands up and announces he's going to Walmart. You go with him, and end up pulling an all-nighter in Walmart. 

Reiner: You two play this game you made up. One will whisper 'pe' and the other has to say 'nis' a bit louder. And you both do this until you're basically screaming penis like third graders in the middle of mess hall. Connie joins in sometimes by screaming 'vagina' at the top of his lungs.

Moblit: He usually has his close eye on Hanji, but whenever he doesn't, it ends disastrously. Hanji decided to climb a tree all the way to the top and ended up getting stuck. It took about two hours and Eren's titan form later to get them down.

Historia: One time she brought something home because she didn't know what it was. When you looked in the bag to see what it was, you told her to bring it back to the store. When she asked why, you told her what it was. It was an industrial-sized vibrator...she was scarred for life after that.

Nile: Actual conversation between you both; You: Hey Nile? Nile: Yes? You: Why is what and what is why? Nile: What's that supposed to mean? You: *surprised pikachu face* Is...is? Nile: Yeah is, is. You: WOAHHHH!!!

Zeke: You saw a monkey one time in a tree, so you pointed it out to Zeke. He seemed a bit reluctant to approach it, but when he did, it climbed all over him like a child on its father. It's like it could sense the monke within Zeke...