| Girl on Fire |

14

VERONICA MALFOY

The room was bright. Too bright. I opened my eyes and squinted as my eyes adjusted to the light. I looked around at my surroundings and I was in the hospital wing. I was laying on a white cot with white sheets. I could feel thin bandages wrapped around my torso. I looked at my hand and saw someone holding it. I looked to the side and saw Mattheo. He sat on a chair with his head on the edge of the cot, holding my hand. Allison laid asleep on Blaise's shoulder. Theo and Enzo were asleep on chairs too. Draco sat on the other side of me. "Draco'' I said, my voice dry and hoarse. It came out as a whisper. "Draco'' I said again. His head shot up and he looked at me. He shook Mattheo's shoulder and Mattheo woke up too. "What happened?" I asked. "What do you remember?" Draco asked. Suddenly, my mind flooded with memories. The truth serum, the questions, the confession. "You used truth serum on me." I said. He nodded. "I had to Ronnie. It was-" he started. "No, you didn't. You did what you wanted. I told you I couldn't tell you what happened and you didn't care." I said. "Marcus can't hurt you or Draco. He's being handled, along with Cormac and Adrian." Mattheo said. I pulled my hand away from his. "You told him?" I asked. "Ronnie, he needed to know." Draco said. "I thought you cheated on me, not this." he said. "Ronnie, it's ok-" Draco started. "It's not. I didn't want to tell you. I didn't want you to know. Any of you. But you didn't care. Who else knows?" I asked. "Snape and Dumbledore." he said. "Great, so now father will know too." I said. "Veronica, it's not your fault. You know that right." Mattheo asked. I didn't say anything. "Ronnie?" Draco asked. "Just leave." I said. "I'm not leaving you. Not again." Mattheo said. "Yes, you are. I don't want you here, any of you." I said. Madame Pomfrey walked over. "If she would like time, you must give it to her." she said. Draco shook his head. "No." he said firmly.  "I'm afraid I must insist." she added. Mattheo stood up and looked at me. Then he walked out. The rest of my friends followed. "Please Ronnie, don't shut us out. Not now." Draco said. "Please just go." I said quietly. He walked out. I couldn't stand it. Everyone knows. The looks on their faces. They knew everything that happened. I wasn't only protecting Draco. I hated myself for it. I didn't want them to know. Now they do. They will never look at me the same. They see me as this broken little victim to be pitied. I don't want pity. I want to pretend it never happened. But now I can't and it's Draco's fault.

I was laying down and reading when Snape walked in. I ignored him. Does he think I'm stupid? That I wouldn't figure out where Draco got truth serum. A potion and who happens to be the potions master. "Hello Veronica." he said. "Come to use more truth serum on me?" I asked. His face was blank. "I'm not stupid, I know you gave it to him." I said. "He was concerned for your safety. And as we've learned for good reason." he said. "You had no right to do that. Nobody was supposed to know what happened. Ever. But you helped him force me to tell him." I said, tears began to fill my eyes. "Veronica, I'm sorry. But something tells me this isn't what you are mad about." he said. "I am. I wanted to pretend it never happened. But now I can't. And that's on you." I snapped. "You can't pretend something like this never happened." he said. "Yes, I can." I said. He shook his head. "No you can't. If you try to cope with this kind of trauma by pretending it didn't happen, it will swallow you whole. You have to talk about it, when your ready." he said. I scoffed. "When I'm ready? You kinda took that part away from me don't you think. I wasn't ready at all. But when my brother forced truth serum down my throat I had to talk about it." I said. "Veronica it's-" he started. "Ever since it happened it's been on a loop in my head so don't tell me how to cope. Because it didn't happen to you. Did it?" I yelled. He took a deep breath. Draco walked back in. "I thought I told you to go away." I said. "Don't be mad at Sev, we were just worried about you." he said. I rolled my eyes. "No you don't get to do that. I didn't want to talk about it and you made me. This was never supposed to happen. I was going to forget about it and it would go away." I said. "You can't even say it can you?" Draco asked. I gave him a confused look. "What?" I asked. "You can't say it. That you were raped. You keep saying it." he said. I looked away. He was right. "Say it Veronica." he said. I shook my head. "I'm fine. I don't need help." I said. "Veronica, you are my sister. I know you. Say it. Just try." he said. A tear fell down my cheek. I opened my mouth to speak. "I- I was r-" I stammered. Tears fell. "I- I- w-was" I tried. He pulled me into his arms and I hugged him. "I can't, I can't do it. I'm sorry." I cried. He stroked my hair. "It's ok, you'll be ok." he whispered. "If I say it, that means it actually happened. I can't." I choked out. I cried and he held me. "It'll get better. You have me, and Mattheo, you have all of us. You'll get through this. You're strong. I know you can make it." he said. I nodded.

After Draco held me for a while, Mattheo came back in. He stood at the back of the hospital waiting. I looked up at him. Draco followed my eyeline and stepped back. "Talk to him." he said. I nodded. Mattheo walked over and Draco stepped out. He sat down next to me and I stared at the white curtains. "I'm sorry." he said. I looked at him with surprise. "What?" I asked. "I shouldn't have accused you of cheating. I just- I didn't know what really happened and-" he started. I took his hand. "It's ok. I know what it looked like." I said. "Are you ok?" he asked. "I'm fine." I lied. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to him. "No you aren't." he whispered. I nodded. "I know." I said. We stayed together the rest of the day.

"Miss Malfoy" I looked up and saw Dumbledore and Snape standing in front of me. "Hello sir." I said. "Mr. Riddle, I wonder if we might have a moment." Dumbledore said. He stood up. "I'll see you later." I said. And he left. "How are you feeling?" Snape asked. "I'm fine." I said. "That's good." Snape said. "I  wanted to let you know that I wrote to your parents- Dumbledore started. No. I looked at Draco quickly. "What?" I exclaimed. "Yes, your father was very concerned. He would like you and Draco to visit home for a few hours as soon as you are released. Here is your portkey." he said putting a small teacup on the table. "I um-" I started. "Thank you sir, we appreciate your help." Draco said. He nodded and left. Snape stood there with concern on his face. "I told you not to tell our parents." he said to him. "Dumbledore wrote to them before I could communicate that. I'm sorry Veronica." he said. "This is a bad idea and you know it. Do you really believe that bullshit?" he asked. "Draco, there's nothing I can do." he said. "Our father is concerned," he scoffed. "At least we get to see mum." I said. "I guess." he said. Then Madame Pomfrey walked over. "You may go dear. You should be all healed up. Just be careful and drink this before and after apparition." she said, handing me a potion. I nodded. Then Draco and I walked back to my dorm. I put on a black skirt and a blouse. I grabbed my wand and put on my shoes. Then I met Draco in the common room. "Ready Ronnie?" he asked. "No but let's go anyway." I said. He gave a small smile. We put our hands on the portkey and landed in front of the gates of Malfoy Manor. The air was cold and it felt dark Draco took my hand. "It's ok." he whispered. I nodded.