The Diary Of Gabriel

You could've saved her!

Fuck, fuck, fuck you and fuck every single pig that lives on earth, these goddamn pieces of shits, these sons of dirty mother fucking goddamn diabolic whores.
I want to burn this goddamn world to the ground but what I do instead is just cry like a little fucking baby to someone that doesn't even exist, fuck, I don't want to talk about it and at the same time I want to world to know how much it's a fucking fuck, I don't even know what I'm writing, I feel like starting a fight with someone and bashing their skull with my bare hands and after that I keep beating what's left in that fuck's skull.

It's been a week since the last time I talked to you; I don't feel sorry for what I said because I meant every word of it. I am sort of calm at the moment to tell you what happened. Basically we crossed out four suspects out of five, and we couldn't really prove that the last son of a whore was the pig, so I went to Badr trying to convince him for three days that we can shake the truth out of this guy if he is the killer and if he isn't we let him go, but no, Badr insisted that we find another way and you know, I went back to Ward's apartment because it was peaceful there to think outside of the box, and do you know what I found? I found Ward lying on her stomach with her clothes ripped and her skin looked like it was beaten a thousand times, her face was not the same as I remember it, it was mutated, oh and she was fucking raped, not just once or twice or a couple of times, she was raped repeatedly for possibly more than six times and when he was finished apparently the fucking pig got bored so he started cutting her randomly in her body, when I saw that scene I thought in myself that I would snap or break or maybe scream but weirdly enough I didn't do anything because it all happened on the inside, I basically collapsed on the inside like a fucking building and I wiped my fingerprints silently, breathing normally with my heart beating at the normal rate as I looked like I was basically an empty vessel just moving through time and space, I collected a semen sample for that tall fuck, just to prove it for him and by the time the test was finished and as I expected it was a match with the fifth guy and later the police discovered Ward's body.
I showed it to Badr and said "here is your fucking proof; an innocent person was tortured to death because you were too much of a pussy"
Badr tried to say "I am sorry"
But before he said anything I punched him in the face and said "don't you fucking dare say it, because that's on you, and next time you recruit someone like I did to you I want you to tell them that story, and when they recruit someone I don't want them to have stories I want them to tell your story"
Badr looked to the ground he was ashamed of himself because he knew that he had no right or excuse to defend himself in any possible way.
I still had to teach Badr the basics of how to not get caught, because we already had the rat in our hands, so I will tell you the rules as if I was talking to him.
First rule never let anyone know that you bought tools for killing.
Second rule steal the tools you will use for the killing or make someone else buy it for someone and you buy it from that someone and make sure those people well not really talk so pay them well or steal the tools because it's a safer option.
Third rule when you steal something put money in its place because we are no thieves.
Fourth rule use different tools for each killing.
Fifth rule make the pigs confess their sickness on tape.
Sixth rule find a way to make that confession public for everyone to listen to.
Seventh rule and most importantly never leave a trace, no fingerprints, no blood, no DNA, not even your handwriting and when you record that mother fucker talking make sure your voice isn't on the tape.
Eighth rule torture these fucks because we're not sure if there's a hell in the afterlife, and because the whole point of this is to make these people feel pain for the pain they did to others.
Ninth rule make a solid plane before you do or think about doing all that
These are the nine rules of justice. Me and Badr knew where the fuck lived because apparently he was the most stupid human ever to exist; he left traces thinking no one would be searching for him, but we did we chose the place to do the deed to be his house, and you know I won't even mention his name while telling you what happened because he isn't even worth to be known just like my father, we found him asleep so we drugged him anyways and tied him to a chair and put tape on his mouth so he couldn't scream or speak.
I looked at him as he was freaked out; he wasn't really freaked out by me he was freaked out by Badr. I pointed at my eyes with my fingers to make him look at me as he tried to scream and then I put my finger on my mouth to make a sign that means "don't make a sound" and so he didn't scream anymore, he shut up out of fear, if you're wondering people in situations like these see more than hearing so making signs was like screaming in his face. So I pointed at my ears and then pointed at Badr, so he looked back at Badr carefully.
Badr said with a dead tone "listen to me carefully because the only way out of here is by following my terms and rules"
The pig nodded with his head meaning "fine"
Badr said "I will take this tape off your mouth, but first I need you to know that if you scream I will stab you and if you talk about something I didn't intend for you to talk about, I will stab you, if you deny to confess to what you did, I guess you know what happens, and believe me I will make sure to stab you in the places that hurt the most yet not kill you. Now when I take off the tape, I'm going to start recording, and you are going to read the questions on this paper out loud with a voice that's heard but not loud enough for anyone outside this room to hear, are we clear on that?"
And so it happened, the pig confessed to what he did on tape after saying his name after it was done and we were about to put the tape back on his mouth to kill him brutally I stopped Badr because I wanted to have a conversation with this pig.
I said to him "why...? Why do you do what you do?"
He said "it's a simple answer like why do you like apples? Or why do you like to fuck? Or why do you like women? when you're playing a sport that you like you can't really answer your question if I asked it to you, since we just like things because we like them, and maybe there's a big reason, but simply doing what I do gives me satisfaction, it makes me feel perfect like I'm whole, now that you have your answer can you just turn me in and get this over with"
After what he said I felt like I heard enough, I felt like it was time to serve justice.
I held the tape roll and cut a piece and got closer to the pig. He said with a nervous tone "what are you going to do?"
I said "what makes us perfect!"
After I said that he realized that we weren't cops so he knew he was fucked and right after I put the tape on his mouth he started screaming but for what purpose no one could hear him. Badr and I, each one had his knife and each one started separating a hand from his arm as we made sure that he was awake during this, we did the same with both his feet, after that, Badr had the wonderful idea to take off this pig's pants.
I looked at him and wondered and said "what are you doing?"
Badr smiled a very scary smile and when I say scary I mean really scary that it even scared me, and then he looked back at that pig.
He said while smiling "Chop, chop!"
He said it in English just like I wrote it to you, and he made a sign with his hands that means he's chopping something. I knew what he was going to do, at that point I knew how much the both of us were exactly the same, it's not like he liked doing that but he had to terrify that shit before chopping off his dick.
You might think it was meaningless what Badr did, but I would say the exact opposite, because imagine when the news are out how many sick fucks would think about what happened here before trying to do anything. After that, we were finished, we left him alone to die slowly in there until someone finds out about his death and we left the tape where he confessed everything right beside him and we made a copy of it in case they don't show the tape to the public. You know the only reason I'm calm is because something beautiful happened, suddenly Badr's wife was pregnant because she showed the symptoms, I was the one to find out because when they thought she was sick I asked to examine her since I have a big knowledge about medicine, after I found out I just couldn't be furious anymore I had to be happy for him at least until I leave Egypt. When I said "she's pregnant"
Badr looked at me and said "I knew that what we're doing is the right thing"
Then he looked at his wife and said "god is rewarding us my love"
If it was someone else I would've suspected that there was cheating involved but Badr's wife fears getting out of the house without having her husband with her, basically he is her life, that's how much she loves him. Just today mother sat with me because she wanted to have a talk with me and so she did. She hugged me and then said "what's wrong my sweet angle, you haven't been glowing as much as you were for a couple of days now"
I said "why do you believe in god, mother?"
She said "and why shouldn't I believe in him?"
I said "look around you! How could he exist with all these wars and people getting hurt and killed, and even if he did exist, why isn't he doing something for all those people in misery, or is he just something that's like a statue"
She hugged me again for seventeen seconds and then said "if god just made a change every time someone was hurt, what would the point of humanity be? Where would our free will go, I believe that if you want to change something in this materialistic world you will need to do it by your hands my dear, god is merciful and beautiful but you just look at the gifts he gave you my son! He blesses us with her light and he guides us through the right path to heaven"
I started crying as I hugged her and she seemed sad that I was sad she just kept calling me down. Right now I am packing my bags because my next stop is going to be Russia after what happened I think a life was wasted for another life to be created, and I mean that because of Badr having a child, and the life wasted here wasn't that shit, I don't I even consider him to be human, I meant Ward's life, next time I won't have feelings because it hurts in a way that's not good and I don't like it and I don't think I would ever let my feelings out again after what happened. I am hurt in ways that I cannot even explain, for the first time I feel like I can't do anything. I will talk to you again while on the plane to Moscow."

Arthur put the notebook on his chest as he looked at the ceiling and whispered as if he was talking to someone "where are you now"
Two days later Arthur started to actually stop grieving on his father because that notebook made him feel like his father was with him, it showed him sides that he never saw or even knew of him. He maybe didn't agree with his father's way of justice, but he did feel bad that Gabriel had to make the world's problems into his like he always did.
A couple of days later Arthur had some free time and he was curious to know what happened to his father after he left Egypt but he wanted to read the rest of Gabriel's diaries more just because he missed his father and so he started reading

"I am on the plane right now as I'm speaking to you and I feel warm because of how Badr's family was just there to tell me goodbye before I get on the plane and right before I left them. I asked Badr "how are you feeling about the child situation?"
I knew he felt happy, but, him answering with happiness in his voice made me a little happy, that's why I asked him. He said smiling as he punched me softly "you wouldn't get it you're not a father yet"
That actually made me smile, but now I have nothing to say to you really so I will write to you again when I'm in Moscow.