𝖍𝖝𝖍 𝖔𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖍𝖔𝖙𝖘

Leorio Snaps: A Thrilling Trilogy

author: motherofye3ts (on ao3)

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Leorio was a stubborn man. Sure, he was patient when he had to be, but the man was one stubborn fucker.

Kurapika learnt this early on knowing him. It was obvious. He had some chill, so that he knew when to restrain himself (unlike the short blond (ok look I'm 5'8 I have every right to call him short)).

So it was no surprise that when he said "after I graduate from med school, I want to beat the shit out of three specific people," he wanted to actually go through with it when he finished med school.

Kurapika thought that he forgot. The topic was never once brought up in conversation, so he thought that Leorio had been so fucking sleep deprived (like every single other college student) that he must've said that while sleep deprived.

But no. Leorio was dead fucking serious. He wanted to beat up three people, or at least the three at the top of his "Beat The Fuck Out Of" list.

He wanted to go least-most on his top three, AKA his #1 Bitch To Beat Up would go last (lucky them).

So he went for #3: Tonpa's bitch ass.

It wasn't hard to find him. Just had to ask the council if he could be one of the judges in that year's hunter exam, and find a short ugly-ass bitch.

He got assigned the second trial, which he made a quiz on medicinal herbs and other medical things you can find in the wilderness while being out in a forest. Tonpa's bitch ass got three of them right, and god that annoying voice.... Leorio would recognize that disgusting voice everywhere.

So he did what all people with common sense do: took Tonpa by the ear, dragged him to a corner and beat him the fuck up.

Everyone knew that Tonpa had gotten his ass beat; it was obvious by his... well, everywhere. There wasn't a single part of Tonpa's body he didn't beat up. Head, balls, feet. Literally his ankles were bulging with bruises. How the fuck do you beat someone's ankles up???

Kurapika said "um chile anyways so" and helped him yeet Tonpa's unconscious body into a dumpster.

-

"Now that he's beaten the shit out of Tonpa, I wonder who he's gonna beat up next," Kurapika said into the phone.

"I think I have a pretty good idea on who it could be, but I'm not sure about it," Killua answered.

"Oop, he's coming, call you guys later."

"Bye Kurapika!" Gon said on the other line before the blond hung up.

"Who was that?" Leorio asked.

"Killua and Gon. They say hi."

Leorio's eyes brightened at the mention of his children their young friends. "Oh, how are they?"

"They're doing good. Did you find #2 yet?"

"Actually, I did. He's gonna be passing by Yorknew for a few days, so I'm in luck. But I will need your help."

Kurapika stared at Leorio blankly for a good minute.

"Heh?"

"You need to hold him in your chain jail for like a minute. So I can punch him and then make a run for it."

"...hold on. Leorio, who the fuck is this person?"

"Ging motherfucking Freecs."

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