𝖍𝖝𝖍 𝖔𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖍𝖔𝖙𝖘

Holiday

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Summary:  Illumi has been working too hard lately, so Hisoka drags him on a weeklong tropical vacation.

Illumi doesn't quite get the concept of how to relax and have fun on holiday.

Perhaps all he needs, however, is the right tourist experience?

Author: mrapplegate (on ao3)

🃏<3📍

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"You better use this, or you'll burn." Hisoka tosses Illumi a tube of sunscreen.

Illumi catches it with his left hand and examines the fine print on the back. "I don't know if I burn or not. I don't generally sit outside without a shirt on."

"Your skin is very fair," Hisoka points out, sensibly. "Don't be stubborn, just rub some on."

"I'm impervious to most things," Illumi reminds him. "Including the elements. As a child, I had to—"

"Oh, stop." Hisoka takes the tube, squirts out a dollop of lotion on his own palm, and smooths it on Illumi's shoulders. Illumi grumbles, but allows it.

Hisoka makes sure he has coated Illumi's back thoroughly, then pops the cap back on. "See?" he wheedles. "Doesn't that feel nice? I would hate for you to be too sore to touch tonight..."

Illumi makes a face. "It feels greasy and I don't like the smell of it." He settles back in his lounger. "Now what do we do?"

Hisoka lifts an eyebrow; waves his hand to indicate the panorama of scenery. "Relax, swim, enjoy the beach. That guy you killed yesterday certainly has nice taste."

"How did you manage to change all the reservations to your name?" Illumi puts on a pair of sunglasses. "I'm still not convinced this was a good idea. Too easily trackable."

"Oh, foo," says Hisoka. "Trackable. You know how I handle things, and 'trackable' is an insult. Anyway, no sense in letting prepaid airship tickets and a week at a luxury resort go to waste. You've been working too hard. You deserve a holiday."

"When I need a rest I just turn off the alarm function in my brain," Illumi says, a bit irritably. "I would have been fine just spending a few days at Heavens Arena. This is overkilll."

"Chill out," advises Hisoka. "It's a vacation."

"What are we supposed to do on vacation? I've never been on one." Illumi twists his mouth in displeasure.

"Relax," suggests Hisoka, again.

Illumi reclines, perfectly still, for a few minutes. He finally takes out a long needle buried in the waistband of his swim trunks, and jams it into his bicep. "I can't relax. Maybe this will help."

Hisoka looks uncomfortable. "Illu. You can't just inject yourself at the pool...people tend to look down on..."

"You wanted me to chill," points out Illumi, but he removes the needle and replaces it out of sight.

Hisoka waves over a pool server. "We'll have two of..." he consults a laminated menu. "These. An extra shot of everything." He smiles ingratiatingly.

Ten minutes later, the server comes back with two huge, neon-colored cocktails, overflowing with fruit garnishes and balancing precariously on a tray.

"What the hell is this?" Illumi looks appalled.

"A cocktail, Illumi." Hisoka sips at the concoction.