𝖍𝖝𝖍 𝖔𝖓𝖊𝖘𝖍𝖔𝖙𝖘

Sometimes Computers Break (Shalnark x Reader)

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Author: Kites-Friend (VivaAlisa) (on ao3)

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"I-I'm worried about you," I mumbled as my hand touched Shalnark's forehead. He'd been awake for so many days that I was beginning to lose count. He promised me that he'd go to bed when I left for work, but that was about eight hours ago. The troupe had sent an important message that needed my blonde boyfriend's full attention.

Angrily, the blonde pulled away from my touch. It was too late. I had already felt a feverish forehead from the lack of sleep. "Don't be. I'm almost done" was his reply.

Rather than start an argument, I decided to pull a chair from the dining room to sit next to him. On the computer, there were lines and lines of random code. His hands were flying over the keyboard like his life depended on it.

"Honey, you said that hours ago."

"I know what I said." He didn't need to raise his voice for me to understand the connotation. Shalnark treated coding as if it were his pride and joy. A sad mix of desperation and annoyance that paralleled his usually joyous demeanor. Truly, this task was only one of the many that he must do in order to stay sane.

My best guess was to stay silent and watch as he continued this rampage that swept across him. A stark silence remained. The only sound was the clicking of keys.

"You don't have to watch me," Shalnark muttered as he broke the mechanical clacking. "I can take care of myself."

"I know," I mumbled; however, I still stayed next to him. The blonde's happy facade always seemed to fade when he was with me. The joyous attitude was what drew me to him so many years ago. Now living together for years, I finally was able to see the cold, dark side of him. "Do you need anything?"

"No. Please just leave. I have to finish this." My eyes closed in a tired acceptance of his feelings. We'd be internally fighting for so long that it was hard to see the happy times we shared.

I scooted the chair back and went to our bedroom. It will be another night where I will be alone in a bed that's too big for me. I change into my pajamas and call him to bed one more time.

"Shal," I sigh at the entrance to our bedroom. "Please come to bed. I know you need to finish this but you need sleep too. The troupe will understand."

"No." Shalnark said. His teeth were gritted together. "You're the one that doesn't understand. The troupe needs me. I don't need someone to tell me what to do. I don't need you."

We both realized what he said at the same time. It was the moment he looked from the screen for the first time while I held onto the door frame. A few fresh tears pricked my eyes but I wouldn't give him the satisfaction of letting them fall. "Honey, I-I didn't mean that," he said while turning away from his desk. "I'm just stressed."

"I know." My voice was a quiet whisper as if I was breaking a secret that had been held under lock and key.

"I'm going to bed," he said while finally standing up from the chair. It was his bandage for his comment. Sleeping in bed usually fixed the problem. I followed him into the room and lay on the bed. Shalnark stripped until he was wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.

Shalnark followed suit and laid on the bed with me. His hands pulled me into his chest for a hug. We both knew he messed up. "I'm sorry." Shal didn't need to say it but he still did; however we both knew that we were finished.