Memories | Sanjoong

12. Broken-hearted

*
I'm jealous of the person who takes your smile
The only way I'll recognise my limits is by trespassing into your heart
*

Hongjoong unwillingly got into his car. He wanted to talk to San but was too afraid of what would be said. He watched his friends in the rear view mirror as he drove away from the Jung mansion.

San didn't know that he had overheard his confession. Hongjoong thought that for now, San didn't need to know.

As he drove, Hongjoong thought about all the possible solutions to this problem. However the only ones he could think of is confronting San about it, or quietly breaking up with him. Though there was a part of Hongjoong that knew cheaters couldn't be trusted, he was desperate for a full explanation. He deserved at least that much didn't he?

As he thought about it again, he felt tears welling up in his eyes, which definitely wasn't safe for driving. He pulled over and rested his head on his hands that gripped the steering wheel. He could get through this. He's been through much worse. A little heart break wasn't that bad...

So why did it hurt this much?

His phone pinged and he looked at it, feeling his heart twist when he saw San's name pop up.

***
Sannie
Hey... we haven't talked properly and it seems like something's bothering you
Call me when you're free

***

Hongjoong pictured San's face, but everytime he did, he heard those heart-wrenching words come out of San's mouth. San's text was so oblivious. Hongjoong had no idea what he would do now.

With a heaving sigh, he wiped his eyes dry and started up his car again. He drove home quickly and went inside, collapsing on the bed. He was so exhausted that he could sleep for days, but his mind was filled with too much to even rest.

-

In the morning Hongjoong felt dead inside.

With very little sleep and emotions completely drained, he heaved himself outside. On his way to the hospital, he stopped at a cafe and ordered very strong coffee. He didn't usually like it, but the bitter taste didn't bother him today.

He stepped into the room his father stayed in, setting his bag down and sitting beside his paralysed figure. As his eyes travelled over the statue-like body, Hongjoong sighed at the pale skin and and numerous wires attached to him.

He was basically a corpse at this point, but Hongjoong couldn't bear to let him go, even if it meant breaking his back for money to keep him alive. Smiling softly, he talked to his dad as though everything was normal. He told him all about the trip that he went on with his friends and about how he was dreading school. He never got much response, but that didn't stop him.

Without noticing, hours had flown by. Hongjoong decided that he would go home and make something to eat with whatever was left in the cupboards. He walked through the hallways but froze at the reception when he heard a familiar voice.

He ducked behind a corner and watched. It was San and he was talking to his own father. Hongjoong wished he could have the courage to walk up to him and finally talk. Though it's only been a day, he missed his boyfriend so much.

However, all feeling left Hongjoong's body as he saw another man approach the father and son duo. The stranger had a charming smile and San's dad seemed to be pleased with his presence.

It looked like San was introducing the two, but he could be wrong. Hongjoong was so desperate to know what they were talking about. Anger filled him when he watched the handsome man stand close to San, patting his hair and then holding his hand.