Find Me / Save Me (Bucky x Reader)

Fifty-Three

Everything was burning, a searing pain coursing through every fiber of your body. I could hear commotion around me, but it was background noise to my own agony. My own screams. I thrashed about, hoping, praying any movement would calm the pain. But nothing worked. I tried to open my eyes, tried to fight the intense jolts of pain that kept pounding through me.

At first everything was a blur, I could make out light and shadows. Blinking I tried again, trying to focus my vision, fighting through the pain. The images began to become sharper and I started to recognize a mass of people surrounding me. Only one face stood out from the rest to me, Dr. Cho.

I then tried to breathe deeply, to speak, when I realized I was still yelling and thrashing around. Willing my body to stop, no matter how painful, I stopped the thrashing and took a deep breath. No longer yelling from pain, my voice too soft, too broken I whispered, "Dr. Cho?"

Her eyes darted right to mine as I spoke her name. Her face showed concern and surprise. "Mrs. Barnes I need you to stay calm. We want to make sure you and your baby are okay."

As soon as she said it, my hands went straight for my stomach. Looking down I see myself and can barely breathe. I'm huge! How long have been out? Panic starts to rise in me again, and tears start to fall from my eyes, blurring my vision once more. "How – How long?" I croak, bracing my eyes close as another shockwave of pain rolls through me. I wince audibly at the pain, but hold back from moving or thrashing about.

"Almost 8 1/2 months Mrs. Barnes. And right now I want to make sure you are okay and that the baby is okay, I'm worried that you are going into labor." Dr. Cho patiently responded, her voice soft and sure.

"Labor? No – no I can't. It's too soon. I – I just found out. My husband. Oh my god – my husband doesn't even know. Please! No! This – There has to be some mistake!" I panicked. This isn't right. What happened? I don't understand. My mind raced as panic started to rise, I couldn't think straight. Everything was fuzzy.

"Please – Please call my husband. He doesn't know. He – We're fighting. He doesn't know. Please." I barely huffed out between breaths. My panic fully constricting my airway and causing me to spiral into an attack.

"Mrs. Barnes. Please. You need to calm down!" I heard the doctor plead. But my eyes stung with tears as I continued to hyperventilate.

"Doll – Doll please, please breathe for me hun." His voice was broken, but firm. I looked around and finally saw him.

"J – James..." It came out as a squeak as my hand reached out for him instinctively. He firmly grasped my hand in his and he brought himself closer to my face.

"Breathe for me doll. Like this. In and out. Come on baby." His eyes were watery, his face panicked as well. But he started to motion to his breathing, and I followed. In and out. In an out. Another shockwave of pain rain through me and I couldn't hold back another scream.

"It HURTS!!! Please it hurts!" I cry out after my scream, I look pleadingly at Bucky and his face shoots to Dr. Cho.

"What's going on?! What's happening?" His voice is not as strong as I expect it, it's almost as if he is pleading too.

"She's going into labor. I need her to breathe or the baby can go into distress and I will have no choice but to sedate her and perform a c-section."

"I'm not ready. I'm not ready. This is too fast..." I look at her and then glance back at my husband. "I'm sorry. I just found out. I should've told you. I should've said something. AHHHH!!!" The pain swelled again and I threw my head back as I yelled.

"You've got this doll. You can do this. I'm right here. I'm not leaving you. Never again. Okay. Just breathe for me." He whispers in my ear softly, reassuringly, while his free hand is smoothing my hair from my face. Opening my eyes, I stare into his. Searching for anger or resentment from our argument. Instead I only find love and relief.