Time and Fallen Leaves :: jeongcheol

TAFL :: 52

*jeonghan*

we stared at each other for a second and he was the one who looked away but he got it back to me after a moment as he heave a sighed and i could feel that he was swallowing hard. i could see the confusion, pain and surprise in his eyes, prolly he didnt see what i did was coming into his way and honestly, i couldn't even knew that i could be that rude over to someone. . its just that, the thing happened earlier keep flushing through my mind while waiting all the way here.

i dont know why i was acting this way towards him like as if he cheated on me when all he did was to bailed me and got me waited almost an hour for nothing. yun lang naman, get a grip jeonghan. you're not even together to act like that.

"j-jeonghan. . im sorry."

my brows furrowed. "for what?" i know what he was referring why he's saying sorry. i just wanted to hear from him what he did earlier.

"for earlier. . my classmate had told me you waited. . im sorry."

my eyes remained on him as i blinked thrice, not knowing what to say. . i was really dont know what to say. my mind may had been full of thoughts since earlier, but now that i was facing him already, saying his apologies while wearing that looked and emotions in his eyes and face, made me had a mental block like as if what i had memorized earlier, i suddenly forgot because of nervousness. i should have known what i was supposed to say, i shouldve known!

i swallowed hard as i tried to speak. "okay lang." thats. . thats the only words that came out of my mouth!

okay lang ba talaga, jeonghan?

he shook his head. "i know its not okay. ." he stepped closer to me and that made me taken aback so i stepped backwards away from him. he bit his upper lip as he looked away again, prolly noticed what i did. bakit ba umaarte ako nang ganito? akala ko ba okay lang?! "believe me or not, i never wanted to go with her kasi diba sabi ko magkikita tayo? that i wanted to see you. . i swear hannie, hindi ko ginusㅡ"

"but you already did."

i swallowed hard as i exhaled a large amount of air using my mouth. this was the first time ive got to cutted someone like this and for worst, it was to seungcheol. i didnt even knew i could do it nor i could cutted someone like that. guess that i couldnt control my mouth already.

"jeonghan."

"okay lang. naiintindihan ko."

always, of course, i needed to understand. i was so close to believe that heaven only made me as a person to understand everything kahit hindi ko naman totally naiintindihan. heaven tasked me to be that understandable to any kind of person. . even to seungcheol. kailangan kong intindihin lahat because i felt like when i couldnt, mawawalan ako nang silbi sa mundong to. it always felt me like that, so kahit i couldn't understand properly, i still tried.