Desires and Secrets

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Jennifer I have loved you for a long time I began... But you always treated me like a little brother, so I never revealed how I felt... I didn't want to lose your friendship so I held back on what I felt for you. I hid it.. When Gideon gave me those tickets and suggested I take you to the game,I was very excited... I was taking the woman of my dreams out on a date.. But I got scared and just rambled off statics and facts as usual... And you treated me the way you always did.. like a little brother.. I'm sorry Spence she began.. JJ please let me finish before I lost my nerves I said... I wasn't losing my nerve though, I just wanted to feed her my lies quickly, so I could get the fuck out of this house and away from her... Anyway I continued I didn't feel you wanted me romantically, that is, so I left well enough alone, you know... For months I thought of you and enjoyed whatever time I had with you.. And then Morgan asked be out I said pretending I was disgusted.. That shit was hard but I did it... I needed someone JJ and I did trust Morgan... So we just happened I said, but it was always you I loved... But why did you reject me when I took you home she asked in her soft voice? Damn I thought I didn't want to answer this, but I was prepared with another perfect lie...I hated doing that I said making my eyes water up, but Morgan threatened to hurt me, worst than Carl hurted him if I left him I said..I felt like a bastard for using Morgan past against him but I had to make this shit believable.. That SOB did what she screamed?