Make You Mine

Chapter 46

"The food is ready. Please, kumain ka na."

I remained my eyes shut and I didn't bother to answer her 'cause I don't have the strength to do so.

My eyes are too painful as well as my throat due to crying non-stop. I'm still in great pain after Kienn and I talked at the parking lot and seeing her hurting like that is really a torture that I need to endure.

"Ava naman. Ano ba? Gusto mo na naman bumalik sa dati? Ganito ka rin no'ng nawala ang lola mo. Kung hindi ka pa namin papasukin dito sa unit mo noon baka patay ka na ngayon."

Tears stream down my face again after hearing those words from Chantel and the memories of the day my grandma died came back to me like it was just yesterday.

I woke up due to the sound of my phone's notification so I slowly get up from the couch. I didn't know that I fell asleep here and it's already evening.

I picked up my phone to see the message I just received and it's from Sab so I immediately opened it.

Sabrina: Grandma is gone.

I froze, hands are shaking and it feels like my heart just stopped from beating.

No... no... this can't be. Grandma is okay. She just came here earlier and baked some cookies for me!

Hindi ko na alam ang mga sunod na nangyari and I just found myself standing in front of their door. I can't even cry nor speak but I can feel the strong pain in my chest, slowly eating me up.

Kumatok ako sa pintuan gamit ang inipon kong lakas at maya-maya lang ay bumukas na rin ito.

"What are you doing here?!" Tita Suzette shouted but I don't have the strength to deal with her right now so step in without uttering any word.

"And who told you to come in?!" She shouted again and grab me on the wrist.

"T-Tita... p-please..." Hirap na hirap na sambit ko at sunod-sunod ng tumulo ang mga luha ko when I thought of grandma. I wanna see her.

"You are not allowed to step inside this house! Get out!"

She pushed me forcefully making me lose my balance so I ended up on the ground. Hindi ko naramdam ang sakit ng pagbagsak ko dahil matinding sakit sa dibdib ko.

"Please, tita... I'm begging you... I wanna see grandma. She... she can't be gone. She's just with me earlier." Tuluyan na akong napahagulgol at wala na rin akong pakialam kung magmakaawa man ako sa kanya if this is the only way.

"What did you say?! She's with you earlier?! She had a heart attack at hindi namin alam kung saan siya napagod at tingnan mo nga namang dahil sa 'yo pala! You should be the one to blame! You killed her!"

That moment naisip ko na sana ako na lang. Sana ako na lang 'yong nawala and not my grandma.

Marami pang nangyari noong gabing 'yon pero sa huli ay hindi ko pa rin siya nakita. I was restricted to go to her funeral and even to her interment and those days were like hell.

I locked myself up inside my condo unit-not eating and depriving myself of sleep. Hindi rin ako pumapasok sa Callister and I just cried and cried until Alex came with Chantel and others. I didn't let them in but they look for a way to break in.

After that, I was confined in the hospital. Nanay Alicia cried so much that breaks me more into pieces so I tried to get better even though it's hard but thanks to them and to my friends 'cause they don't give up on me.

"I'm sorry for what I've said." Chantel sat beside me and rub my back continously 'cause I can't stop from crying again.

The pain I'm feeling right now is more than the pain I felt when grandma died and I don't know what to do about this anymore.