Dallas Winston - 𝕀𝕞𝕒𝕘𝕚𝕟𝕖𝕤/ℍ𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕔𝕒𝕟𝕠𝕟𝕤

♡︎hold

A/N: modern

I put my earbuds in and I slid down the wall and hid in Ponyboy's room from the gang. I played the songs that hit me hardest and I began to cry, remembering every painful memory.

"I'm sorry, I can't say them without it making me cry." I said and he smiled at me. "Come on, y/n, just say it. Take your time," He said and I smiled, he was just trying to get me to face my fears I guess.

"Well, he said 'I love you little girl, I'll see you later.' And that was the last thing he ever said to me." I felt the burning in my eyes as I said it and I looked down and started laughing, "Told you I'd cry!"

"You did fine." He said and smiled at me. I looked away as he started talking to his buddy. I struck up a quick conversation with my friend before I felt a grip on my arm. I looked over and he had his hand on my arm. "I'm here for you." He said and I smiled. I nodded and I turned back to my friend and started blushing furiously.

I heard rustling on the door, and I took an earbud out. I looked up and I heard a voice. "I don't know man, this door is locked I think she's in here." Dally's voice boomed from the other end. Soon he burst in and looked at me. He carefully shut the door and furrowed his brows.

"Y/n? What're you doing?" He whispered. He stood in front of the door and I looked down and wiped my tear.

"I- my- it's not easy to explain. I'm going home." I said and I tried to push passed him but he grabbed my shoulder and pushed me onto the bed.

"You're not going anywhere." He said and I looked down and played with my promise ring.

"It's fine, it really is." I said and he kneeled down in front of me and lifted my chin to look at him. "You ain't thinking of that Jack kid are you?"

"The memories just came back and I- miss him okay? Is that so bad?" I said and looked away from him. He looked down and back up at me and sighed heavily. He walked over to Ponyboy's desk but I didn't care enough to see what he was doing. I just looked down and continued to silently cry.

He came back and slid a note into my breast pocket of my denim jacket and left without saying a word. He went to sit on the Curtis's couch and catch a nap before the rodeo tonight. I quickly left with my head down before anybody could question what I was doing and I walked home.

~~~

Buck's house party, I'll be in the second room on the left upstairs at 9. - dal.

I sighed and crumpled the note up and laid on my bed for a little bit. It was already 5 now, he'd be returning from the rodeo any minute now, and he was gonna stay at Buck's house party all night? I dunno if I could work up the self respect- or lack of- to go. But he obviously cared enough to invite me to meet him, in private, maybe it was worth something.

Dally is heartbreaker but sure knows how to make your heart beat some. Some girls would kill to get in invite like this. I mean, I've always had a crush on the tall, older, dark haired boy. Him being 18 and I 16, I always hesitated whether to show my feelings or just keep them hidden enough to forget about them. Tonight, they all came back. But also tonight, my feelings for Jack came back. I wasn't sure what to do about my strange predicament.

~~~

I didn't bother knocking, I just walked in. I didn't care about the stares and the catcalls that were being thrown at me, it was only a few. Mostly people ignored my presence. I walked up the stairs at 9:30 and knocked on his door, afraid of him forgetting about his note and him hooking up with a broad in there.

He opened the door, a large bruise going from his cheek to his forehead, avoiding his eye. He was wearing a black t-shirt and his jeans, and his hair was semi-messy. He pulled me into his room almost immediately after opening the door.

"What the hell were you thinking earlier." He said and I looked at him and furrowed my brows. "If you've asked me to be here just so you can be a dick I'm leaving."

"Why're you so upset about a guy you haven't talked to in a year?" He said and I paced the room. "I'll always love him. Nothing I do or say will change that, I'm not in love with him, but something about me just wants to be at least friends with him again." I answered. I answered with the truth.

"Why are you still holding on?" He said and sat down on his bed. There was something different about him. I tried to shake off my soaked hair from the rain as best as I could.

"Cause I know I'll never be able to love somebody like that again." I said and looked back up at him. "Even though there's somebody that I want to so bad, that isn't him." I made eye contact with him and there was something different about him. He was, I think, jealous.

"You're stupid to think that." He said and stood up and faced me. I looked at him confused and he shook his head. "Really, I mean, I feel like if you want to love this guy then you should be able to, better than that jackass could ever love you."

I wanted to smile because he was actually giving decent advice to me, but I remained straight faced. He looked at me in the eyes again and I shook my head. "Yeah but the funny thing is, this guy would never love me back. He's not that type." I said and he chuckled.

"What if this guy already loves you?" He said and I laughed and looked down. "I'm pretty sure he doesn't. And he seems to make it obvious." I said and he smiled. He grabbed a towel and handed it to me when I started to get annoyed at my hair, so I could dry it.

"Do you love him?" He said after a little while of silence. I stood there and thought about it, maybe I did love Dally. I mean, how could I not? He made it so easy. He was always so cool, and nonchalant, and gave zero fucks to the world. I smiled and looked back at him. "Yeah, maybe I do." I said and he seemed to blush.

He made eye contact with me again and the smiles dropped from our faces. He carefully placed a hand behind my head and pulled me in to kiss him. Once our lips connected, I knew exactly why he's been so weird and jealous. He loves me?

When we pulled away I furrowed my eyebrows. "Don't tell me that was just the heat of the moment type of thing because god damn you, you know how to make me crave you." I said and he chuckled. He pulled me in and wrapped his arms around me and I held him.

"There something about you, y/n." He said and I looked up at him, continuing to keep my hands around him.

"Oh yeah? What's that?" I said and he smiled and looked at me. "You sure know how to make a guy crave you."