Just Right ... There? [JENLISA]

Chapter 32

Lisa's POV

I keep all the pain to myself, I never told anyone not even Jisoo neither Jennie. 

I went along, zipping my mouth. I don't want to utter a word when my judgment is clouded with anger and fear. My mind is all over the place. I might say something that I would regret in the end. 

I'll cling to Jennie's words. That she loves me, that she won't leave me, that we will fight together. 

I'll hold on, not until she would slap the truth right to my face that she doesn't want and needed me anymore. Just the thought of it making my whole being trembling from so much pain. 

I stirred from the bed, with eyes still half-closed I grab my phone, hitting her contact. I was too excited when the call went through, or so I thought.

Voice prompt: The number you have dialed is currently busy, please try again later. 

I heave a deep sigh, feigning the aching of my heart. I'm almost on the stage of numbing from all the pain. Day by day I'm getting used to it.

I haven't even seen her for days. For a month, I could even count with the fingers in my hand the time she spent with me, she's still sweet and cuddly though.

No morning calls nor late-night talks. She would just send a message that her schedule is tight that she has practice, photoshoots, and others. I totally understand or I convince myself to understand. I was so afraid, that if I would complain or laid my thought she would think I was being immature or unreasonable.

I know she's meeting the man, having fake dates, or was it still fake? 

Sometimes she would inform me that she and Ji-Yong would have dinner or go out for the sake of their pretend relationship. 

Even if she keeps on saying, that it was just all an act, a show, fake, or whatever fucking is it. It surely damn hurt. 

"Lisa?" 

I instantly wipe the breaming tears in my eyes. I should really lock my room since I'm living with Jisoo who doesn't know the word manner and never practice how to knock.

"What?"

She stands next to the bed, fully dresses ready to go, "Aren't you going to work?"

"Yeah nah, I'll pass today. I already inform Mina about it."

She widens her eyes in surprise, dropping her butt on the bed and pressing her palm on my forehead, "You're not down with a cold. Yet, what's happenin'? I know you, even if the world will about to end you'll still show yourself at work. What change?" 

 I swat her hand away and glared at her, "I need time to rest, I feel like a walking dead." I jest.

I know Jisoo won't buy it, she's looking at me with those eyes again. Even if I wouldn't tell her, she knows. She certainly knows.

"Okay Lis, I'll go then. Don't forget to grab your brekky. I didn't cook anything. Just eat outside." She hesitantly slides away from the bed after patting my shoulder.

"Use my car chu."

After Jisoo went out of my room, I dragged my feet inside the bathroom. I don't stink, but I need a cold shower to alleviate myself. 

I head out from my flat with a hoodie and sweatpants on. Walking into the street of Hongdae with the gentle spring breeze brushes through my skin somewhat calms me. 

Spotting my favorite cafe, I saunter towards it. The chime above the door frame produces a jingle sound as I open the door. It somehow made me smile.