As If I'd Ever Be Gay! || Chanlix

Chapter 22

Chan sat there, dumbfounded. He couldn't say he didn't expect this to happen, yet for some reason he hoped it wouldn't. He'd be lying if he said it didn't hurt. His heart felt crushed in this very moment. 

He could hear the shower running, loud sobs coming from the other side of the bathroom door. 

It took him a moment to process everything that had just happened. His "straight" best friend of 14 years basically tried to have sex with him for a reason unknown. Why would a guy like him ask to have sex? 

Chan couldn't help but think maybe Felix had used him to figure out whether he actually liked men sexually or not. Felix used him. The older man had foolishly thought that maybe Felix felt the same way about him and that was why he asked, but Chan was living in a fantasy to hope for such things. 

Why would he think a man like Felix would ever love him back? Felix has yet to come out and still thinks of himself as straight. The blonde never even confessed his feelings either. Sure he was clingy and touchy, but that could be mainly because he is lonely and only really has access to Chan. 

The older man sighed, pushing away his insecurities and knocking on the bathroom door. "Lix, are you okay?" He nervously asked after a few seconds of silence. All that could be heard was the muffled sounds of Felix's crying. 

Chan was unsure of what to do in this very moment. Felix hated being left alone, yet obviously needed it in situations like this. Felix would probably get mad at him if he actually gave him some space to sort things out. 

"Can I come in?" The older man nervously asked, hand hovering on the door handle. Once he began turning it, he finally heard Felix speak. "N-no! Please go away!" Felix called back, hugging his knees closer to his body while he cried on the shower floor. 

"But I just want to talk-" 

"I said go away! Leave me the fuck alone!" Felix yelled, crying even harder than before. Chan felt crushed. He sighed, walking into his room and throwing himself on the bed. It was around 10:00 PM right now and all this drama made Chan feel exhausted. He knew sleeping would be a good option, so he threw himself under his covers and decided to try to sleep the night away, hoping that maybe things would be better in the morning when everything's calmed down. 

Felix on the other hand was washing his body, scrubbing away the trace of sin on each body part. He hated how he could still remember every touch. The way Chan's soft hands violated each part of his body, the way his husky voice sounded while finger fucking him, along with the look of seduction and pure lust on his features. He hated how he loved it. He hated how he was still hard at the memories. 

He turned the shower to it's coldest setting, moaning at the feeling while tears fell from his tired eyes.  The droplets never stopped coming. He scrubbed until his skin felt raw, resting his head on the wall of the shower. 

He had only requested to sleep with Chan for his own selfish reasons. Sure he could've watched porn, but that wouldn't be enough. He needed to know his sexuality. He couldn't be gay. It was just the general idea of sex that turned him on. Men were gross, Felix knew that better than anybody. Homosexuals were monsters. Felix knew he could never be one of them. He was just horny is all. He doesn't actually like men. 

Felix felt a bit better coming to such a conclusion. The only reason why he got hard was because the general thought of sex was nice. The blonde grabbed his towel and ran to his room, noticing that Chan had already gone to bed. 

Felix got dressed quickly, knowing that tomorrow was going to be another painfully long day because not only was he out of cigarettes, but Chan was going to be home as well. The blonde folded his towel, fixed his room up a bit, and laid in bed to hopefully fall asleep. 

His mind was running wild, causing him to toss and turn uncontrollably. He couldn't stop thinking about Chan. He couldn't get the older man out of his head. The blonde laid there, body growing hot under the covers. The room started to feel like a sauna. He began panicking. He threw the covers off of his body, enjoying the feeling of cold air on his skin. Maybe he couldn't sleep because it was so damn hot in his room. 

Felix curled up into a little ball, shutting his eyes in hopes of finally falling asleep. He tried to clear his mind, think of anything but what just happened tonight, yet for some reason he couldn't stop thinking about it. He couldn't forget the way Chan's lips felt against his, and how perfectly they fit together like a puzzle piece. He couldn't get the feeling of his hands off his body. Each part felt like it was on fire, burning for more of Chan's touch. 

The blonde shifted uncomfortably, noticing the tent in his pajama pants. He moaned, running a hand down his chest to his hard clothed shaft. He rubbed it gently, just like how Chan did earlier. He mimicked each motion the older man did to him, growing painfully hard. 

He slid his pants down to his knees, grabbing hold of his member and stroking it slowly. His mind flashed with images of Chan, from his sweet voice to his sexy body and handsome features. The blonde moaned, picking up the pace. 

He remembered the way Chan played with his nipples, lifting up his shirt and grabbing at the soft buds to remember the feeling. Felix couldn't control the moans that fell from his pretty lips. Everything felt too good in this moment. So good that Felix forgot about how gay this actually was. 

Felix played with himself, mind flashing with endless images and memories of Chan. He couldn't get enough. "D-dammit, Chan. Y-you ruin everything." Felix whispered to himself, moaning even louder at the feeling. He was thankful Chan was a heavy sleeper. He wouldn't be able to live with the shame if Chan knew what he was doing. 

Felix couldn't help but remember the feeling of Chan's finger inside him. The thing he was most afraid of felt the most pleasurable. He didn't know something like that could feel so good. He knew that if Chan continued, he would've came immediately. Felix felt his end grow closer, remembering the sweet feeling of those bundle of nerves being played with. 

Chan's words rang through his mind, "It feels good here doesn't it?" Felix said no in that moment, but god yes did it feel good.  The blonde pumped himself harder, moaning when he finally released all of his cum onto his stomach. His body twitched and shook while he rode out his orgasm. He kept pumping, more cum coming out each time. 

This was the most Felix has ever came while jerking off. He didn't think that much coming out was possible. He grabbed a towel from under his bed, cleaning his body off and laying back down onto the covers. The post nut clarity hit him hard. He started crying after realizing what he just did. 

The blonde managed to cry himself to sleep.