|| Star-Crossed ||

70

2 DAYS LATER
CAROLINE POTTER

It's cold. It's cold and I'm scared. But I'm not scared to die. That's what I want. I want to die. I don't think about escaping. I don't want to escape. I don't want to live anymore. I don't want to find Harry or Max or any of my friends. I don't want them to see me. To see what I've become. I don't want to look into their eyes after what I did. I don't want them to know any of it. I want to die and I think it might be best. If Harry finds out what they did to me, he'll lose it. Anger will cloud his judgment and he won't think straight. He'll be so focused on revenge he'll lose all sense of reason, of strategy. And we'll lose. We'll lose the war. If I die, Harry gets to remain oblivious to the horrors of my time here and I get to be at peace. And who knows, maybe if I die it'll be enough to push Draco just enough for him to join the right side. I've been trapped here doing nothing but thinking and I've run every possible scenario. And in every one, my death ends in our victory. Now I'm probably biased due to the extensive head injury and overwhelming suicidal ideation but I don't know. All I do know is that if Harry found out I was a sex slave for death eaters he would kill everyone and then himself. I will do everything I can to make sure he doesn't know. To make sure he never ever finds out. That's all I care about.

"Good afternoon, Potter. Ready for some fun?" 3 death eaters walked towards me and I sighed. "He asked you a question," the other spat. "What do you want me to do?" I asked. I was so tired and my body hurt so badly. I know this looks bad. Like I want to do it or like I like what they are doing to me. I don't, I swear. I just can't take another beating. I thought I could. But they are so much more brutal and aggressive and violent then the Dursleys ever were. They beat me until I'm unconscious and then burn me until I wake up. Then they beat me again. It's a vicious cycle and I can't do it, not today. "So eager, huh? I'm starting to think you're enjoying your time with us," he said smugly. That made my heart wrench. Tears fell to my cheeks. What if Draco thinks that? Or Theo? What if they think I like it? "Get up," he said sharply. I used the bars to help me stand and they stepped toward me. "Fucking hell! She's disgusting!" he exclaimed. I looked down as my eyes filled with tears. He was probably right. I haven't bathed in I don't know how long. And just a few days ago, that death eater poured alcohol all over me and I never got to clean it off me. "She smells like alcohol and grime!" they said. "Maybe we should give her a bath?" one said smugly. They all looked at him strangely. He whispered something in their ear but I could barely hear. "The garden," he said. They laughed and nodded. The man grabbed my hair and began to drag me through the house. I stumbled and fell and he kept dragging me. I struggled to get my footing and then we were outside. For a moment, I didn't care what they were going to do. I was outside. I took a breath of the fresh air and the cold wind left goosebumps on my skin. Then I saw it. Past the garden, there was a big fountain. Now I understand. "Please- wait- I can't- please!" I said. He dragged me all the way over and threw me into it. The water was freezing and my entire body went under. The second I came up they grabbed me. "They told us your brother held his breath for an hour in the triwizard tournament. I wonder if you can do the same?" he said. "No! Wait- please!" I cried out. The other two grabbed me and together they pushed me under. I tried to inhale and I fought as hard as I could. I held my breath and kicked and scratched. I got my head above but just for a second. I took another breath before they forced me under. Water was splashing everywhere and I was freezing. Maybe I should just stop fighting. Maybe I should just let them do it. Maybe it's for the best.
Suddenly, their hands left my body. The second they did, I shot out of the water gasping for air. I draped myself over the side of the fountain and my vision was blurry. Then I saw him. Draco was walking towards us with his wand drawn. Then Theo ran behind him. "What the fuck are you doing?" he roared. The death eaters looked at him in shock. My teeth were chattering, my lips were blue and I was shaking. "Are you fucking mad?" Draco spat. "Sir, we were just-" he started. "I don't care! Your orders were-" he started. "We know your orders too, Malfoy. You were given one more chance. If you protected the girl again-" the death eater started. Draco narrowed his eyes. "How dare you speak to me like that? You work for me! And I'm not protecting her right now, if we are being completely honest, I just helped you." Draco spat. They scoffed. "You were drowning her. She could have died. And your orders were clear. You cannot under any circumstances endanger her life. Can you imagine if you killed her, and by accident? It would be you in that cage, being tortured." he said. "I apologize, Sir. We got carried away." he said. They all nodded. "Go. I will be reporting this to the Dark Lord and he can deal with you. Get out of my sight." Draco spat. They rushed off and Theo ran to my side. He pulled me out of the fountain and I laid on the ground, coughing and shaking. "Theo, go get her a bath." Draco said quietly. He nodded and Draco knelt down and picked me up in his arms. My head rested on his chest and I looked at him. "You should have let them kill me," I said. "I'm selfish," he mumbled.