Luke -
I feel awful, I haven't seen Rylie in nearly a month. Management won't let me go back to visit her, even when we don't have any shows or meet and greets. I hope she doesn't think that I've abandoned her, she'd be beyond pissed with me if she does. I can't help it, management is sucking some ass and won't let me go. Saorise won't go either, she can but she won't. She says that she won't go without me, but I think she's just afraid to go see Rylie alone.
****
"Saorise, you have to go see her. She's probably thinking that we all abandoned her, you have to go see her and talk to her so she's not alone for a while. Please, just this one time." I beg my brother's girlfriend as she sits across me backstage.
"No, I won't do it without you. You're her boyfriend, she probably wants to see you more than anyone else." She crosses her arms and glares at me
"Maybe she doesn't care who it is, as long as she has company for once. Those nurses probably aren't doing shit to make her feel at home."
"Luke, you can't just expect me to leave Beau all of the sudden. He was terrified that I was going to dump him after he got on tour, I can't just leave him again." She argues, I roll my eyes.
"He'll manage a few days without you, you're the one who doesn't want to leave him. I know what happens when you're not with him at night, you have nightmares and scream your head off. You can't sleep without him, that's the whole reason why you won't go. I can't believe how selfish you're being, you're her best friend and you promised that you'd go and visit her once a month but now you won't do it!" I stand up and tower over her, she lets out a frustrated groan.
"Yes, I can't sleep without Beau but that's not the reason why I won't go!" She shouts back at me
"Then why won't you go!?"
"I don't want to go there and realize that she's already gone! I don't want something to happen to her once I get there and have it be all my fault!" She screams at me before starting to cry, causing Beau to come over and calm her down but she pushes him away.
"Saorise, the hospital would've contacted me if something happened to her. Nothing is going to happen to her as soon as you get there, can you please just do this for me?" I beg her, she wipes her eyes and looks up at me.
"What if the hospital didn't contact you about her because they wanted you to hear it in person, not over the phone? I'll go, but you're going next week without me. Okay?"
"Okay."
I pull her in for a tight hug as she gets on the phone, trying to make something work out.
"Luke, don't listen to what she's saying. I'm sure Rylie is perfectly fine, they wouldn't make you wait to hear anything about her if something did happened. They'd want you to get there as soon as possible. Okay?" Jai tells me and pats me on the back, I give him a sad smile and nod.
"Alright, let's go show those ladies out there how to party!" Beau yells, cueing us to exit the dressing room and head backstage before the show begins.
I feel awful for all of these fans, I just got into an arguement about Rylie and now they all expect me to go out there and party when all I can think about is her? How the hell am I supposed to be focused on the crowd getting pumped up when my mind isn't even there? I think about her constantly, I'll be doing regular things and she'll just pop into my head because I'm reminded of her. She's my first thought when I wake up and my last thought when I fall asleep, and in nearly every thought in between. If I can't sleep at night or I'm missing her more than usual, I call her phone because I know that I will hear the voicemail we created together.
"Hey! I'm Rylie"
"And I'm Luke!"
"We can't get to the phone right now."
"But leave your name and number."
"And we'll get back to you as soon as we can."
"Thanks, bye!" We say together in unison.
I smile at the thought just as we're about to go on. I plaster on a fake smile, here goes nothing.
A/N - I would like to formally apologize for you waiting so long for another chapter. I would also like to inform you that I have had writers block for the past few weeks and I've also been quite busy with school and such. I am positive that I won't be updating quite as often due to the end of the school year things going on but I promise that I'll be working on some new things as soon as summer is here. I love you and thank you for understanding!
