Rylie -
Saorise is leaving today, that means Shawn and I only have 18 days until we're going towards the light. We haven't forgotten about it but we've begun to have hope again with Daniel and Saorise coming to visit. Shawn isn't as excited about leaving as he was but he's still willing to do it because he doesn't believe that his family or friends are going to visit him on his last days. I'm just praying that Luke comes before we leave, I'm going to regret it if he doesn't come. I still have hope in him, Shawn thinks I'm insane for still believing that they're going to come and see me when we only have just barely two weeks left of staying on this planet.
Luke hasn't forgotten about me, I know it. I can feel it. If he truly is my soulmate (which I think he is, but Shawn says it's bullshit) then he couldn't forget me. How could one simply forget a loved one without a freak accident? He still has all of our memories and pictures and everything, there's no way in hell that he forgot about me. He could try to get his mind off of me by doing other things but that does not mean he completely forgot about me.
Do I think he's my soulmate? Yes, I do. Sometimes when you meet someone, you just click. I don't believe in love at first sight, but I sure do believe in the click. I just felt the click when I first met Luke Brooks. The first day I talked to him, I was immediately attracted to him. I noticed all of his features, how he looked when he was nervous or laughing. I fell in love with him right in that moment where it felt like it was just us in the world, that's when I felt the click.
"Hey, Rys. I have to go back to the boys today, but I promise I'll be back with Luke soon." Saorise sits down on my bed and takes my hand. Shawn was sitting on the ledge, not really paying attention to Daniel. "I just wanted to say that I love you, I know I don't say it enough but I love you so much Rylie and I'm so proud to be your best friend. As much as I don't want to say this but you're so strong and you've held on for so long.. But if you want to, it's okay to let go. If you're in any pain or you don't want to stay, you can let go. I'm okay as long as you're happy." She starts crying but wipes her tears away with her free hand and lets out a deep breath. "I should go finish packing, I promise to come back as soon as I can with Luke. I love you to the moon and back, and that's a promise." She links her pinky with mine before placing a kiss on my forehead.
She stands up and wipes her eyes, then grabs her bag and turns around to leave. Daniel looks up from his brother's body and notices her tears.
"I'll watch her while you're gone." He gets up and pulls her in for a tight hug. Once the words leave his lips, she's a mess and cries even harder. She finally pulls away and nods, whispering a thank you to him and gives me one last glance before exiting out of the door.
"Rylie?" Shawn's voice startles me.
"Yeah?" I reply, getting up and sitting on the ledge besides him.
"Are you going to let go?" He whispers, I sigh but shrug.
"I will once I think the time is right. Right now, isn't the right time for me." I answer
"When will it be the right time?"
"When Luke comes."
"Why? Why do you keep believing that he's going to see you? He's clearly not coming back for you, get that through your head! He is not your soulmate!" He begins to freak out, I play with the necklace he had gotten me.
"I know he's coming back because I feel it. Your heart knows things that your brain can't explain. He is my soulmate, my heart feels it and so do I. If I want to let go, I'm waiting for him to say goodbye because I'm not just going to leave him without him seeing me for one last time. I don't want to bring him anymore pain than I've already caused. Do you know how that would effect him? He'd be depressed and wouldn't be able to go on with the tour, he'd let down thousands and probably millions of fans. He's already down in the dumps because of where I am right now, so I'm not going to make it any worse for him." I try to stay calm about the whole situation.
"I-I'm sorry for freaking out, I just don't want you get your hopes up and have them be crushed when he doesn't come."
"He will. I know he will."
