Solstice Souls

Harmony From Discord

Lan Zhan POV

Lan Zhan made sure Wei Ying had rested and eaten well, so he would be on top form for this stupid night hunt. In his mind, it was stupid, because his Wei Ying had done nothing but try to fit in, try to be friendly with these people, yet they were ever ready to cast the first stone.

He knew they would likely make it difficult for Wei Ying because, even though they had managed to get some support, this marriage was not a favourable match in the eyes of the GusuLan Sect. He wondered if anyone he had picked would have been good enough, but the truth was, Lan Zhan had never thought about marriage or its implications, or how much politics were involved.

He had changed so much already, and it had happened ever so slowly, without him noticing. Now, looking back, he could see what he was like before meeting Wei Ying, and now after meeting Wei Ying, meeting his wonderful dancer, and falling in love.

The old Lan Zhan had stuck himself to their rules like gum from a tree, with almost a mindless devotion. The rules were there for their protection, weren't they? They had made him feel safe, with the surety that if he followed them diligently, no harm would come to himself or his Clan.

Abolish evil and then goodness will prevail.

But those same rules could also imprison a person. Not allow them to be free, not allow them to really live. His life too, had been one confined to only residing in their substantial library or the Jingshi.

How sad was that?

And now he was starting to think for himself, not only that, but act on it. He was really beginning to understand the confining way of life he had led until now. Of course, he wasn't ready to ditch the rules, because they weren't all bad, and a lifetime of studying couldn't be erased overnight but he could appreciate the elasticity of his thoughts now. If he had learned to be flexible, it was in part due to Wei Ying and his own thought process. It was comforting to know that he was still his own person, not someone blinded by love.

If anything, his love for Wei Ying had opened his eyes rather than closed them.

He sighed to himself.

How long before his family and his Clan accepted Wei Ying?

Would they ever?

What would stop them from pulling out challenge after challenge, in a bid to stop this wedding? He should have insisted that this be the final one...if he had learned anything from his encounter with Madam Yu, it was that he should be secretly four or five steps ahead of those around them. The saddest part to all this was that this was his family - that was the main reason he had let his guard down.

All of his life, the importance of family and the Clan had been drilled into him, not just verbally, but through the examples led by his uncle and his brother. This was all very well, and something he himself had added to in his mind, a loyalty not possible to break. But what happened when the thing you rested all your goals upon, placed all of your trust upon, slowly cracked? So much so that it became unreliable?

The fissures were already forming like the cracks upon an icy lake exposed to the first sunshine of spring.

Warm and comforting, Wei Ying was his sunshine, and the cracks were the ice surrounding his heart.

It was terribly difficult to see for himself how much politics had changed his Clan. Before, a good moral conduct and righteous behaviour was enough definition of the Lan Clan ... .whereas now, it was only true in so much as if it brought them more power and success, especially with regard to the other clans. Almost as if it were some kind race to an imaginary target.