Romancing the Devil

CHAPTER 9

“Pinagtiisan ko lang ubusin dahil nakakaawa ka.”

Kanina pa nagre-replay sa utak ko ang huling katagang sinabi ni Callum sa akin kanina. Hindi ko alam kung bakit bigla siyang nagalit sa akin. Hindi ko alam kung bakit bigla na lang siyang umalis at gano’n ang sinabi sa akin.

Does he really despise me so much?

“What did I do to you, Callum? Bakit ganiyan ka na lang umasta sa akin?” bulong ko sa sarili ko habang pinagmamasdan ang singsing na siya mismo ang nagsuot sa akin noong araw ng kasal naming dalawa.

Magdadalawang linggo pa lang kaming magkasama pero ganito na ang nangyayari sa aming dalawa. Hindi na kami magkasundong dalawa.

“Romance him . . .”

And my father’s voice still lingers in my mind. How can I do that if he’s this cold to me right now? How can I romance him if he despise me so much?

“How fucked up my life is, really.” Iling ko sabay sandal sa backrest ng aking swivel chair.

Pagkatapos kong pagmasdan ang paglayo ni Callum sa akin ay hindi ko kinausap si Dustin. He tried to talk to me but I just can’t talk to him yet when I felt so down. And for the second time, he witnessed how I felt unwanted. Hindi lang pamilya ko ang nakapagparamdam sa akin no’n ngayon, pati na rin ang asawa ko.

Sheina tried to talk to me too when I went out of the elevator but when she saw my expression, she shut up and went back to her work while Dustin tried to keep up on me but I refused to talk him.

“I want to be alone,” I whispered.

I want to think. At hindi ako makakapag-isip hangga’t may nambubulabog sa akin. I know their intentions were good but I really just can’t focused if I’ll let them bug my mind.

Kaya naman pagkatapos ng trabaho ko ay mabilis akong lumabas ng opisina, sumakay sa elevator para magpahatid sa basement. Nang makita ako ni Kuya Benjie ay pinagbuksan niya ako ng pinto ng sasakyan. I slid inside and waited him to maneuver the car.

Buong biyahe ay tahimik lang ako at tulala habang tinitingnan ang aking cellphone. I’m waiting for Callum’s text but it did not come until I reached the mansion. Lumabas ako ng sasakyan at nakitang wala pa ro’n ang sasakyan ni Callum. Hindi pa ba siya uuwi? It’s still early but . . . I just want to talk to him. I want to ask some questions that’s bothering my mind for hours now.

Nagalit ba siya dahil kay Dustin? Bakit naman siya magagalit, ‘di ba? We’re just married by papers and we really don’t own the hearts of each other. I know I should understand him but he really just confused me all the time.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit siya nagagalit. Hindi ko alam kung bakit palagi na lang biglang nagbabago ang mood niya. He’s confusing me, big time. At gusto kong magtanong sa kaniya kung bakit gano’n.

“Oh, nandiyan ka na pala, Hailey. Wala pa si Callum. Mukhang nag-overtime . . . o baka nag-inom?” alanganing sambit ni Nanay Juliet.

“Hihintayin ko na lang po siya,” saad ko bago nagpaalam na aakyat na.

Nasaan na naman kaya ang lalaking ‘yon? Baka nag-inom na naman ‘yon dahil galit siya sa akin? Paniguradong hindi ‘yon uuwi nang maaga.

Bigla ko na namang naalala ang nakita ko kanina sa opisina niya. He was kissed by that woman. Sino ‘yon? Kliyente? Kalandian? O babae niya? But he said he pushed the woman away from him after she insisted the kiss. Should I believe? Should I believe that he didn’t liked the kiss the woman gave to him earlier? I know I shouldn’t doubt him but how would I know if he’s telling the truth, right? I’m just his wife in papers but I have the rights to be . . . jealous. May karapatan akong magreklamo dahil asawa ako. Legal.