This Time

|30| IKA-TATLUMPUNG KABANATA

— AIDEN —

"Uh, do you want anything to drink first?"

"I'm good, Miss."

"Suit yourself." She says and took a sip of her red wine. And I knew that drinking wine indicates that maybe she's nervous about this, just as I am. 

I've been contemplating this situation as I made my way to their house. Wondering if this is a good idea and if I'm ready for it. My mind thought of many reasons why this shouldn't happen, but my heart kept pushing me to purse what it wants.

"Before anything else, I just want to clarify, you do know the consequences of all this, right?" She gestured between the two of us.

I nodded. "I'm aware."

It's not necessarily illegal since we're both adults, but that doesn't mean this isn't unprofessional. More so, the power dynamic in this.

Although if there's anything she's more worried about, I guess it would be how Aaron would take this. But I know she won't say anything to him as we're not technically anything but... friends, I guess.

"And you still... want to be with me?" I nodded once again. "G-d, why? You're young, Aiden–"

I cut her off with a scoff. "And we already established that as well, Miss. Sorry for interrupting, but I already explained everything to you. And my age doesn't mean shit."

"Excuse me?" She raised a brow, a look of annoyance crossing her beautiful face.

"Sorry for cursing, Miss." I mumbled quietly, cheeks heating up. 

Shaking her head, she only sighed. "You can't blame me for worrying, Aiden. Besides, you said it yourself, you know the risks. This, us, this isn't going to work."

"But I want to try, don't you?" I asked seriously. I realized that beating around the bush and being subtle won't take us anywhere. I think want Amayah needs is a straightforward answer. "Are you willing to take the risk of being with me? Do you like me enough for that?"

Her mouth moved as if to say something, but no words came out from her. I could see the turmoil going on in her head, the way her brows furrowed and lips form a thin line. She's hesitating, thinking.

And I think that's better than saying no right away.

"Before you answer that, I just want to add something." Her brow raised in curiosity. "I'm not expecting anything right away. Like I said, I know the risks and it would be unethical for you to date your student."

Amayah rolled her eyes, probably to herself. We haven't really said the word 'student' and 'professor'. The main reasons I believe why this is a hard decision. But it's true, if we date now, it would be unethical, especially on her part.

Maybe I shouldn't have said the word.

"I'm not saying you will, but if you give me a chance, I can wait. I will wait. The first semester is almost finished and there's a chance you won't be my professor then, I'm willing to wait until you're finally ready."

"And if I'm not?"

I shrugged despite the feeling of hurt. "T-Then I have no choice but to respect your decision. I'm not here to force myself onto you."

Amayah nodded her head in understanding, lips pursed and eyes watching the way the liquid swirled around in the glass she's holding. Seemingly contemplating, I waited patiently and quietly to let her think and process her thoughts.

"If I'm ready, what then?"

"I'll be waiting. All I need is for you to be honest with me, because I don't want to wait for something that won't happen. I need an assurance that you want the same thing as me."