Feel Something (BounPrem FF)

Chapter 48: Keep Flowing

On the next Saturday Chan was volunteering at the nursing home. He made it a mission to do as much as possible for as long as possible. He helped around at his aunt and uncle’s restaurant a day or two, and deep cleaned his dorm many times until it was spotless.
   
He did any and everything to keep himself busy and off his phone or else he’d be waiting for a text he wouldn’t receive. He also needed to keep himself busy since he hadn’t seen or spoken to Sinn much in the past week.
   
They weren’t angry at each other, or breaking up, but Sinn needed space. Chan knew that Sinn needed time to himself and with his mother. He knew Sinn wasn’t going to feel better overnight, and the boy wanted to give him as much time as he needed.
   
So Chan was at the nursing home. It made him feel good to help people. He had also grown quite attached to some of the elderly, including Fah.
  
Fah had really good days, but she also had bad ones. Chan would visit and act as if they had met for the first time, and if she remembered anything it was a plus.
   
This day was the same as before, with a group activity in the large empty room. Chan began setting up tables and chairs with the other volunteers and Gia.
   
“Chan, can you go get Fah? She’s in front of the TV by the front desk.”
  
“Yep!”
   
Chan spotted Fah and knelt down beside her before wheeling her away. “Fah, it's time to paint. Are you ready?”
   
“Mmm. I’m ready.” A large smile appeared on her face, and Chan felt as if she may have remembered him that day.
   
Chan stood up, but didn’t move right away because someone at the front door caught his eye. “Sinn?”
   
Sinn was just as surprised to see Chan there. “Chan?”
   
“Are you here to volunteer, too?”
   
Sinn looked behind the boy at the room full of people and quickly came up with an explanation. “Yes.”
   
“Everyone is ready. Come join us.” Chan pushed Fah as Sinn followed them into the room. “Here, Fah. Your favorite spot.” Chan set her up in the same place she always sat, facing the window.
   
Chan gave Sinn her apron so he could set up some paint for the man next to her. “Hmmm…what should I paint today?” Sinn poured some paint for her and she gladly took her brush to it. “Something yellow?”
   
“Paint the sunrise in Tak,” Chan suggested.
   
“Why the sunrise? Why not the sunset?” Fah painted a yellow half circle to begin.
   
“I suppose either will work. The sunrise shows the start of a new day that wasn’t promised. The sunset shows the end of a day that you were glad to have.” Chan came back and stood next to Sinn. “Either one will look perfect.”
   
“Oooohoo so full of wisdom, this kid.” Fah began her painting and Sinn watched his Yaai in such a relaxed state. “Should I paint a river or grass?”
   
Sinn was surprised, because now his Yaai was looking up at him. “You're asking me?” She nodded. “Oh…um…river.”
   
“I like it!” She picked up another brush and began with the blue. “Why do you pick the river?”
   
“Mmmm… Rivers never flow in reverse. You should never look to your past.”
   
“You missed one. Persistence. A river cuts through rock not because of power, but its persistence.”
   
“Oooohoo. Fah, so wise. Tell me everything I should know.” Chan gave her a cheesy smile and she giggled.
   
“My boy, just go with the flow. You’ll learn along the way. I promise.”
   
While Chan helped others, Sinn stayed watching his Yaai paint. He focused on every stroke of the brush and how she blended the colors.
   
“What’s your story, boy? Can you tell me where your river is headed?” She spoke to Sinn without taking her eyes off her work.
   
“Mmmm…I've made a new path. This river has become much more calm. Less obstacles. I think I can just flow now.” He looked over at Chan and became stuck on the boy's smile and soft eyes. “I may even merge with another river.”
   
“Merge? Like marriage?”
   
“Maybe someday.” Although the laws in Thailand didn’t acknowledge gay marriage, the idea wasn’t erased from Sinn's mind completely. He could still dream.
   
   
When the class was done, Chan and Sinn helped everyone back out so they could do their own things. The last in the room was of course Fah. She was fanning her canvas when the boys walked in to get her.
   
“Fah, it’s time to go.”
   
“Here.” She held out her work to Sinn.
   
“You want me to have it?” He was surprised. He had only spent one day with her. When he looked at the big picture, he adored the bright colors of the flowing river and setting sun.
   
“Fah, you picked the sunset. It looks to beautiful.” Chan admired the work from behind Sinn.
   
“Are you sure you want me to have it?”
   
She nodded again. “I painted it just for you. I painted two rivers merging, right there. And I picked the sunset, because I was glad to spend this day with you.”
   
There was a gleam of something in her eyes when she looked up at Sinn, and for a second… “Yaai…do you remember me?”
   
She didn’t take long to think, and she was disappointed, but still kept a smile. “No. But I remember that I’ve missed you.”
   
“Y-yaai?” Chan looked between them, then slowly realized that Sinn must’ve been her grandson that stopped visiting.
   
   

Chan waited with the other residents as Sinn spent time with his Yaai. He was secretly happy he never told Sinn about the grandson he wanted to scold. It would’ve made Sinn feel bad. After Gia explained things to Chan, he understood the situation. Sinn's situation was more than an explanation for his absence.
   
Once Sinn came from Fah's room, he and Chan walked outside together and sat at the bus stop.
   
“Sorry I thought you were a volunteer. I didn’t know you came to see your Yaai.”
   
“I should probably volunteer though, right? I’ve been letting you have all the fun. It was nice spending time with her this way.”
   
“Hia…are you okay?”
   
Sinn looked up into Chan's eyes. The boy could hold so much behind them, and Sinn wanted to see it all. “I’m okay now. I’m sorry for being so absent.” He felt bad for ignoring Chan for a few days. Be was just too caught up with his mother and Dee.
   
“No need to apologize. You should take all the time you need to heal. You know that I’ll be waiting for you.” Chan said it so matter of factly because it was a fact.
   
Sinn scooched over on the bench and intertwined his fingers with Chan's. “Let me come over then.” Sinn suddenly had a pep in his step. He rested his chin on Chan's shoulder and blinked his googly eyes.
   
Chan's eyes smiled at his silly boyfriend. He loved when Sinn tried to act lovey-dovey. “What’s this? What’s gotten into you?”
   
“Fine.” Sinn sat up straight.
   
“Wait! I didn’t say no!” Chan whined and buried his face in Sinn's neck, placing soft little kisses in the process.
   
“Hey, not there!” Sinn tried to push the boy off quickly, because that was a sensitive spot for him. “We're in public!” Chan smiled and bit gently. “Babe!”
   
Both equally startled, they looked at each other. “What did you say?” Chan kind of liked the way it sounded. A mischievous grin appeared on his face as he raised an eyebrow.
   
“Nothing.” Sinn backed up and then stood up as soon as he saw the bus coming.
   
“I think I heard you say—”
   
“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Sinn jumped on the bus as the doors opened and Chan had to run to catch up and hop in.
   
In the back of the bus, Chan sat next to Sinn and they smiled while holding hands.
   
“Hia, thank you.”
   
“For what?”
   
“For coming back to me.”
   
“There was never another option. I was always going to come back to you.”

*~*~*The End*~*~*