The Sensible One (boyxboy) ✓

Chapter Fifty Five

[Max's POV]

It wasn't that I didn't trust Lowell, it more that I didn't trust myself.

Lowell clearly didn't mind me being unsubmissive, but I could tell he had been taught to behave and expect a certain level of submissiveness from not only mates but in general his pack, which, I was slowly realising, he considered me a part of. 

I wasn't fully certain if it was instinct or parental tutelage but did feel like something that would not be entirely sensible to sit and reason with, and would be something, instead, to work around.

The only weakness I felt I truly had was the astoundingly intense need I had to be touched by him, a sex drive I'd never had for anyone else apparently appearing out of the blue just to be tortured with it, pleasure that made me feel half displaced.

Lowell had keyed in on this weakness particularly quickly, and a long sleepless night left me with dark rings around my eyes as I slowly limped from bed, trying to be as quiet as possible while cursing the ache and pinch in my lower back, the marks littered over my chest, neck, thighs and even arms, bite mark near my neck had nearly blinded me with pleasure, and apparently healed into a little pink mark astonishingly quickly.

Unfortunately I was half hard when I got up, and although it went down as I dressed as quickly as I was able, it felt rather like a betrayal, my own body egging Lowell on.

This was important, however, not just to show support for my friend, but to create a clear boundary.

I was not in his pack, and I could not be considered a subordinate. 

I was older than him and knew what I was doing in life. He might naturally feel like he needs to offer me some sort of protection, but I wasn't a werewolf and whatever strange world they lived in was not mine, not yet. And while I did not want to upset him, it would be easier for him to accept me doing my own thing if he knew he could not change it, rather than getting frustrated that he felt like he should be able to tell me what to do.

That said I thought he might be a little upset by me leaving and so I did leave a note on his bedside table.

Good morning,

I'll be back late midday. 

I'll bring pastries from Patrie, a wonderful bakery next door. 

I love you,

Max

I took great care to be quiet as I left his room and only took my wallet and phone with me. I wasn't sneaking, just being careful not to alert him.

Yes, I could just tell him I was going, adult to adult, but a scowl, a guiding hand, rough push and a dark look followed by a kiss that felt dangerously addictive, so easy to fall for, so easy to forget what I was doing, it was all it really took. And I was fairly embarrassed by that.

I had a few odd looks from pack members as I got out of the house.

I can't have smelled wonderful and I knew there was a fair few marks on display that I couldn't hide until I changed my wardrobe back at home, where I would soon shower as well.

I waved at the familiar face waiting outside the gate and he seemed startled when he saw me, attempting first to jog over but that jog quickly turning into a limp, and then a slow shuffle. He waved back.

"Jeff!" I hugged him lightly before typing in the code.

He seemed to examine me with somewhat panicked eyes. "You're late, and you're... not at home?"