A murderer for a father: Jean L. Black ||Sirius Blacks daughter

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,,Shh, Jean it’s fine. He’ll think about it again...I hope”, Remus mumbled, stroking Jean’s brown curls. She hugged him tighter and sobbed: ,,Why wouldn’t he say anything? Am I not important to him?” ,,He’ll catch himself again. Just give him a few days. He’s just back from that Cave up in the mountains. And he’s glad that Harry made it out alive after what happened last year”, Remus tried to calm her. ,,But Moony, you don’t understand. He just dismissed my feelings like it was nothing. He didn’t even flinch when I asked him to choose”, she continued sobbing. ,,I do, sadly”, he mumbled. He took Jean’s head in his hands and wiped her tears. ,,Don’t worry too much. I’ll talk to him”, he assured her and kissed her forehead. Jean was surprised but happy. She had never received a forehead kiss. It felt like Remus actually cared about her. She felt like Remus and tonks had been there for her through all of it and she felt like they were her parents. She felt save with the both of them.
,,SIRIUS SHES YOUR DAUGHTER”, Jean heard Remus shouting. She was just getting a Glass of water when she heard him. ,,AND SHES FINE. HARRY’S LOST HIS PARENTS AND HAD TO LIVE WITH THESE HORRIBLE MUGGLES FOR 10 YEARS”, Sirius shouted back. Jean tiptoed closer to the door to eavesdrop. ,,ELAINE WAS BROUGHT UP BY A FOSTER FAMILY AND JEAN LIVED WITH ME. THEY NEVER HAD ANYONE RELATED TO THEM. BESIDES, THEIR MUM DIED WHEN THEY WERE A FEW MONTHS OLD AND AS YOU KNOW, YOU WERE NEVER AROUND EITHER AFTER YOU GOT YOURSELF ARRESTED”, Remus yelled. Her dad was quiet for a few seconds before saying: ,,Jean and Elaine are strong girls. And especially Jean can do it on her own. I know that. She doesn’t need me but Harry does. He... he’s different.” Jean’s heart sank and she heard Remus ask: ,,Why? Because Lily died protecting him? Because he’s ‘the chosen one’? Because he’s James’s son? Jean is your daughter and she needs you just as much.” Jean smiled behind the door but heard her dad sigh: ,,Jean...reminds me so much of Marlene. She has her smile and her gentle but forceful way. And Harry... reminds me of James. He looks just like him. Except for the eyes...” ,,They’re Lily’s”, Remus completed the sentence. Her dad sighed again and mumbled: ,,Jean is doing fine on her own. Its her way. Harry needs me more at the moment”
Once again Jean’s heart dropped. She had hoped that he would realize that she needed him.
,,That’s no excuse Sirius. Do you want to know who was there for her, when you weren’t? I WAS. AND DORA WAS. SHE AND I WERE THE ONES BUYING HER FIRST BROOM AND SEEING HER OFF TO HOGWARTS. IT WAS MY PLACE THAT SHE STAYED. SHE SPENT CHRISTMAS AT MY PLACE AND IT WAS DORA AND I WHO SHE TOLD ABOUT HER FIRST BOYFRIEND. IT WAS DORA WHO COMFORTED HER WHEN SHE WAS SAD THAT YOU WERE GONE AND IT WAS I WHO TOOK HER TO DIAGON ALLEY. Sirius, we have been more like her parents then you and Marlene were. When Marlene died I promised to take care of Jean if something happened to you. She loves you so much but she’s hurting that you won’t show her the love that SHE deserves. If you intend to keep your daughter then act like a father. You can’t always run away from your responsibilities”, Remus explained and Jean could hear the anger and sadness in his voice. She wiped tears from her eyes. Remus’s words touched her deeply. And she noticed that he was right. It had always been him and Tonks to take care of her. It had been them to take her to diagon alley for the first time and it had been them to watch her first quiddich game ever. It was Remus who she could turn to if she needed a good advice and it had been tonks who she could ask if things got tough. Her role models had always been them and she really viewed them as her parents.
It was quiet in the room. Neither Remus nor Sirius were saying anything and Jean, behind the door was scared to move, in case she made a sound. Then she heard her dad’s voice again: ,,I uh, never thought about it that way. I always thought that she knew how much I love her. The both of them. She’s... one of the reasons I didn’t loose my mind in Azkaban. She keeps me going. Remus, I’m such a bad father. God, I don’t even know when my own daughter is struggling.” Jean heard a thud and she assumed that her dad had sat down. ,,Padfoot, you’re not a bad father. I know it’s hard for you to stay in hiding and to be back at this place... Still I think you should talk to her, you know”, she heard Remus comfort her father. ,,She’s so difficult to handle. She definitely has a temper”, her dad answered. ,,Wonder who she’s gotten that from”, Remus chuckled. They both laughed. Even Jean, who had her eyes full of tears, stood behind the closed door and smiled. She heard Remus sigh once again and heard him walk toward the door. She quickly and quietly hid behind a statue when she heard him say: ,,Just try to see things her way.” Her dad answered: ,,Thanks Moony.” Then Jean heard the door open and Remus stepped out.
He closed the door behind him and to her surprise he said: ,,I know you were listening in on the conversation.” She panicked for a moment and then stepped out behind the statue. ,,I...just wanted to get a glass of water when I heard you shouting. D’you think he actually meant what he said?” She saw Remus smile and he answered: ,,Find out yourself. Now’s your chance to talk to him, without anger influencing you.” She hesitated for a moment but then nodded. She walked toward the room and past Remus. When she was about to open the door she asked: ,,What if-“ ,,Jean, just trust your instinct. You know that Tonks and I are always here for you, but just talk to him”, Remus interrupted. Jean nodded and Remus walked away. She took a deep breath and opened the door.
Her dad was sitting in an armchair, his head rested in his hands. ,,Dad?”, Jean muttered, hoping to get his attention. He looked up quite confused and answered: ,,Jean, what are you doing here so late. If Molly catches you, she’ll freak out.” ,,So, you’re not gonna freak out? Look I’m sorry about earlier. I shouldn’t have made you choose between me and Harry”, Jean explained. He looked at her a bit unsure about what to say. ,,No, it was my fault. I should have given you more attention”, he finally said. ,,You should’ve?! Dad, you barely even looked at me for the last year. I mean I can understand that you don’t want to talk to Elaine because of her behaviour but why me? I’ve been sending you letters all year. The only question I have is why?”, Jean snapped. She thought to herself, why in the world did she snap at him like this again. She knew it wouldn’t do anything. Her eyes met her dad’s and she was waiting for him to respond. Finally he broke the eye contact and mumbled: ,,It’s enough, Jean. Go to bed now.” Her eyes widened. She couldn’t believe that he would dodge her question like that. All her rage came back to the surface and she lost it on him: ,,Oh, so you’re not gonna answer my question then?! THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I MEANT. EVERY SINGLE BLOODY TIME I TRY TO BOND WITH YOU, YOU JUST DISMISS ME. You know, Remus is right. He and Tonks are better parents then you. I don’t blame mum for dying, it was not her fault. But I blame you for being such an awful father to me. Just try to not be a git for once, will you. I wish you would’ve stayed in Azkaban.” She slapped her hands over her mouth. What had she just said? She just looked at her father one last time and saw the sad look in his eyes. She couldn’t stand it. Then she stormed out of the room and up to her, Ginny’s and Hermione’s room.