Warming the Ice Queen's Tears

Chapter 40.2

Alonna

Masarap ng hangin at ang ganda ng paligid. Nasa likod kami ng bahay at nagpapahinga sa duyan sa ilalim ng puno. Nakalagay ang kamay ko sa dibdib at siya ay nakaakbay sa'kin habang nakatanaw kami sa dagat. Nasa mataas na lugar ang kinalalagyan ng bahay kaya kitang kita namin ang lawak ng dagat kasama ng mga taong lumalangoy sa isang malapit na resort. Nakakawala ng pagod at ang sarap sa pakiramdam

I heard him sigh in contentment before kissing the top of my head. What we have right now is what I've always wanted. Peaceful with the people I love. Wala ang mga anak namin at hindi rin magtatagal ay makakasama ko rin sila. I smiled when I felt happiness with calling the kids ours.

"Gusto mo nabang pumasok?" Ang sarap ng pakiramdam ko habang hinahaplos haplos niya ang buhok ko.

Umiling ako. "Let's stay for a bit more."

"Okay."

Isang linggo na rin mula nang tanungin niya ko tungkol sa nakaraan. I was still thinking about it 'til now but thanks to the gentle breeze and the smell of ocean, my mind was clear and my decision to tell him my story came to my mind.

"Kristoff?"

"Hmm?"

Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga at nilaro laro ang isang butones ng polo nito. I wouldn't tell him all parts but part of me felt scared. Would he accept me if he knew my whole past? Pa'no pag nalaman niyang hindi pala ako ang babaeng minamahal niya? Iiwan niya ko at natatakot akong mangyari 'yon pero naisip ko narin na sumugal. I would have to be strong enough to hold his rejections.

"We were in a car crash when I was eight, my parents, me and my auntie. I lost my parents that day." He stiffened and stopped caressing my hair. "Sa LA kami nakatira non since I was six."

"Honey, hindi mo na kailangang ikwento sa'kin kung hindi mo pa kaya. I understand."

Tumingala ako para tignan siya. He was looking down on me with concern in his eyes. "I need to do this. Alam kong hindi ako makakaramdam ng ginhawa kapag hindi ko to ginawa and I also feel like I owe you this. If we're gonna spend our lives together, I need to open this things up for you. For me, for the kids...for us."

He smiled sweetly at me saying that he understood. He kissed my forehead and I closed my eyes, savoring his sweet gestures. Inilagay ko ang aking mukha sa leeg niya at nagpatuloy.

I told him all well-not all. I left the part about my true name and the things I did for revenge since I stepped in this country. Okay, I left the most important part and I lied when I said that I'd stop my revenge. Plano ko naman talagang tumigil pero alam kong mahihirapan ako dahil magagalit siya.

"And also..." huminga muna ako ng malalim dahil talagang kinakabahay ako dahil sa mga susunod na sasabihin ko. "Th-this is not what I look like b-before."

"What do you mean?" puno ng pagtataka ang boses niya. Napapikit ako at inihanda ang sarili sa mga sasabihin niya. I lifted my upper body and faced him with the courage I built inside me.

"My face. I told you that there were two of us who got sold and r-aped. Yung kasama ko nagkaroon ng head injury and I was...my..my face was severely beaten. Nagpasurgery ako but they couldn't fix my face so they changed it. Binigyan nila ako ng bagong mukha and it's really very far from my original face. Pero kasama ng bagong mukha ko, nagbago rin ako. Ang ugalli ko, ang kilos ko...lahat lahat. I erased all the things connected to my old self but the pain was still there-is still here." Turo ko sa tapat ng puso ko. "It hurts nang nalaman kong sarili kong pamilya ang nagdala sa'kin sa impyernong 'yon. That's why it's hard for me to just drop it all. It's hard to stop my revenge."