Chapter 34- Lunar Eclipse

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The following week passed in a blur, Emmaline trying to find a routine to bring back any form of normality.

Hobi and Jay had been around for less than a year, mere months. Emmy was hoping there would be something familiar and safe about her daily life alone. After all, she'd done it for so long before the guys had come into the picture. She'd woken up alone, gone to work alone or with Alexi, eaten alone, and fallen asleep alone so many times in the not-so-distant past, but things weren't the same as they used to be. The loneliness was previously easy to ignore. Now, she was drowning in it. The waves crashed around her, and she was struggling to resurface.

Jay and Hobi had stampeded into her life at full force, leaving a gaping hole behind them that was hard to ignore. The ghost of them was everywhere, and there were constant reminders of them in everything that she did. They were in the bookstore, reenacting stories for the kids. They lingered by the piano, waiting to watch her play. She saw them in the bathroom mirror, with paint smeared on their face, and in her car, belting out songs. Everywhere she looked, they haunted her, a phantom shadow of what once was.

She had taken to sleeping on the couch at night, and her back was punishing her for it. The bed would have been more comfortable, to be sure, except it felt so empty. She once loved having that bed all to herself, being able to starfish across the mattress to her heart's content. Without her guys, it felt cold and sad. She'd rather have a sore back.

Emmy threw the blanket off her and moved to stand up, moving slower than molasses as of late. Sleep was evading her, as it had every night that week. Hopefully, moving around would at least work out the restless leg syndrome she was so annoyed with. Her groan broke the silence in the house as she put her hands on the base of her spine to stretch backward, trying to get the kinks out, to no avail. Before she walked away, she eyed the quasi-pallet that had taken up residence on her couch with a look of distaste. Maybe more pillows would help.

She walked to the window and looked out at the night sky. Stars dotted across the blackness, looking like a dusting of freckles. It was the total lunar eclipse that night, the last for over two years, but she couldn't bring herself to be excited about it or stay up to watch it happen. She knew some of the others were having a viewing party. They invited her to come over, hoping the snacks and games could bring her even a modicum of joy, but she couldn't bring herself to pretend she was okay yet.

Emmy wandered through the house, getting her circulation moving again and hopefully tiring herself out. It was the only way to function anymore, push herself to exhaustion so that she could finally get some sleep. She walked into the baby's nursery, not bothering to cut on the overhead light. There was a full moon night light plugged into the outlet on the wall that guided her in, casting a golden glow across the room. She rubbed her belly absentmindedly and pictured herself in the future with her little nugget, rocking him in the glider, putting him to sleep in his crib...

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