Shot in the Dark: A Mick Mars X Ozzy Osbourne Story

Chapter 52: The More Things Change, the Worse Things Get

If it weren't for my wrinkled hands, hands that are still strong very much so....and my ever-fused spine.... reminding me that I am in fact truly the 'old man' now, I'd fucking swear to you my honeymoon with my husband was yesterday. It's the same for Ozzy despite all the shit he's gone thru as have I, what with our health issues, drugs, booze and injuries. Speaking of health, I believe the last time I left you with a taste of things to come....raising children, albums, touring etc.....and Ozzy and I expanding our family and THAT pregnancy REALLY rocked Ozzy and I to our cores, especially me....all I will say at this point is that THEY were and are healthy....but the struggle was worse than with my pregnancy with Michelle and Angel and that brings us to September 1986, my twin daughters basically 2 & a half or more precisely September 10. 1986....a day that scared not only me but my family and that is where I'll pick up this Shot in the Dark tale.

1986....what a fucking whirlwind....my precious daughters turning 2....a tour for Mӧtley, raising the girls, celebrating a year of marriage with my much beloved Prince of Darkness, Ozzy recording an album and Tommy Lee-Sarzo giving birth to his and Rudy's first child: their son named Oliver Thomas born November 9, 1985 and so it being September 10, 1986....Oliver will turn 1 this year and of course one Vince Neil became pregnant as we all discovered this summer on tour and now that we are all caught up that brings me to things, I've tried so hard to keep hidden for a while now from my family, could have been for the past two months or so I'm not sure....all I DO know is I've been miserable as FUCK.

Moody, beyond stressed.... gaining a shit ton of weight which I've managed to keep hidden by secretly having a wardrobe tailored and buying bigger clothes. And then I don't wanna eat but will eat a ton and I've been getting sick, I am SCARED....terrified.... what if I am dying? What if.... oh god, I know I.....Ok, ok.... the real reason Mick is you're scared to admit to yourself that you may very well be pregnant. I've....just had so much going ON....and I haven't wanted to worry Ozzy, I know that I SAID I'd give him more children and I meant it or so I thought.... something if I AM pregnant, it FEELS different....i am weaker than before, things feel worse.... then again, I've been more prone to illness with my spine and NOT being pregnant. I died the last time, I can't.... i just don't know if I can...

"Mummy?" Oh crap.... I'd just checked on them, they were sleeping...napping, Ozzy is away....i think doing an interview, he didn't want to leave but I told him that I'd be fine...and I can't f-focus.... maybe the girls climbed out of their beds? again, I don't know...

Angel, I think....and another set of tiny precious feet meaning her sister....i close my eyes as I am in the bathroom floor, trying to BREATHE.

"Mommy call daddy! Need hep...lots a help...."

"N-No... I AM s-sorry...." Each word is forced out, because I can tell both my daughters are scared and I believe crying, again hard to focus....still on my knees, I manage to hang my head over what I THINK is the toilet and heave and heave....and now I am the one crying and it hurts...that acrid burning....tiny hands and voices desperate to make me feel better as for a moment, I lay back against the toilet. I go to try and get up but am stopped by both Angel and Michelle. And I am sobbing.... SOBBING.

"Mummy sick...Weawwy sick.... Way down mummy Pease..." Angel begs me.

"Mum, why no tell daddy? I Weawwy scared!" Michelle cuts right to the heart of the matter as it were, wailing practically which breaks my fucking heart, and I hear small retreating footsteps that rush back with water for me, as I drink greedily and clean my mouth out, both girls at this point are clinging to me and I FINALLY answer, my arms wrapping around them carefully as I shake.

"I...I... just didn't want to worry your father.... we've been so busy. But the real reason is I am scared to admit.... that well, I may be pregnant." I whisper practically, trying not to get sick again and trying to calm my daughters, they need me.

"Mummy....mean have baby?" Angel asks tearfully.

"Yes....m-maybe........ just that.... mommy has a disease.... that makes m-my spine stick together, like paste you can't get off...it HURTS...AND... I f-feel worse...than I did with the two of y-you...." I am not even fully thinking about the fact that I am opening up to my little girls.... but it seems indeed I am. "Mommy...I... almost went t-to be with the angels...and sleep forever. I slept a long time when you were born. You two...are my precious little girls....i n-never thought I'd have you, and....I... I just am scared! And....oh no...." unmercifully I feel really dizzy and like once again I am gonna get sick. I try and get up....i need to take care of Angel and Michelle, I just feel like such a failure right now as a mother and the fact I've hidden this from my husband.

"m-mummy....no! no.... Pease fee betta! how get daddy helpy?!" Both little girl's chorus. And it is about this time the phone rings and somehow, I KNOW its Ozzy....i groan, and despite my daughters' protests crawl my way to the phone, the both of them despite being scared stay with me, though they are fucking petrified...the room rocks more and the phone rings desperately almost. I close my eyes....and too my shock, I feel tiny sets of hands somehow managing to hand me the phone, though they struggle with it. Allow me to interject here.... both little girls and it was and is more than a twin thing, knew something was wrong and they were so smart and God, Ozzy and I were so proud of them then despite their fears of them staying with me, trying to help....and what is coming next.... well once I realized or was told....it fucking floored me...

Everything seems to be muted.... the dizziness is making spots appear on the edges of my vision....and I am vaguely aware of Ozzy's frantic voice calling for me....and it seems that....

Is it just me or do they know how to answer the phone? Maybe.... maybe.... oh shit....

I grab desperately for something, as I vomit and vomit into it....and I don't really know what else is going on, or really what's going on now. I cry...feeling like shit, like a shitty parent...partner, wanting my husband....to be here, to help me with my fears....

I manage to stop puking I think, but I can't focus wrapping my arms around myself, holding my stomach...curled up in a ball.

I feel tiny warm hands caress my face, two precious sets.

"Mummy....daddy.... daddy scared an' he on way.... he on way mummy.... hang on...." I feel it is the voice of my Angel.

"Mummy...daddy said wuv ew an' pwoud (Proud) a' us." Sweet Michelle.

Turns out since Gene and Nikki lived closest and it just so happened Gene's mother, luckily was visiting.... they came to get Angel and Michelle....

Time is eternal....my stomach....so big....i am so scared, more so than before.......Am I floating? Laying amongst the clouds.... being cleaned up? I don't know....

Two cries....as I desperately cry out for my children.... worried that they are hurt and that I've failed them....and then I am surrounded by Citrus and Spice....Ozzy.... maybe an ambulance has been called? I think is that what I heard? Am hearing?

"Mick?! Fuck.... blimey.... I'm here firefly...I am here...and I am so sorry.... girls are ok.... they are ok......"

Dizziness resumes.... i close my eyes.... black starting to line the edges of my vision....

"Oz.... s-sorry...f-forgive m-me.... love you an' the girls." Each word flows out like molasses, and then I give into darkness....

A/N: Forgive me for the cliffhanger and the drama.... next chapter will be mick's awakening and finding out life changing news, once again...