Shot in the Dark: A Mick Mars X Ozzy Osbourne Story

Chapter 63: A Gathering Storm

Christmas 86 was memorable...being HOME. Being with my family, making memories with my children, my twins and my unborn.... all my little miracles. Ozzy, the infamous and beloved Prince of Darkness, MY prince of Darkness was my absolute fucking hero...my oracle, my strength when I had NONE. Always though my memories were tinged with bitter-sweet....and the high cost of my pregnancy was as always as a storm cloud.... that sadly.... only came to grow.... Sure, New Years, Jan. 1, 1987, was good.... but things started going downhill AGAIN during my fifth month, my belly grew ever more.... what little energy I had gained during the holidays.... seemed to be fading more and more. Everything was that much more difficult. Ozzy bless him, took care of me and the girls.... He wasn't alone for EVERYONE insisted on helping with whatever we needed, was needed period. Vince couldn't be stopped I remember that very well, his daughter as it turned out was fine even though he was only a month ahead of me in his pregnancy....month 6, though fucking terrified me for I was in pre-term labor....that by some miracle they managed to stop....and then we come to my 7th month.....and the hardest thing I've ever it felt then I had to do....came to pass, just after our daughter's 3rd birthdays or to be exact March 18, 1987 literally the day after.....

My husband is in tears.... conversing with the Doctor and I don't like where the fuck this is headed. They look solemn and I practically cling to my very well-swollen stomach....and I have oxygen on. The triplets from what I can understand.... are ok, healthy.... amazingly, and that is all I can ask. I miss Angel and Michelle who are with The Sarzo-Lee clan.... i am tired.... i don't want to do what I know in my heart is coming....

The storm gathers strength, a month of being home I think.... that didn't last long, deep down I knew that....and I am going to I am SO afraid have to go into the hospital, no I know I am....immediately most likely.... oh....i feel Ozzy, holding me now...sobbing...FUCK....

"Mr. Osbourne.... I was discussing it with your husband. Given the increasing pressure on your lungs....the need of oxygen and such, as well as the pre-term labor that we managed to stop....and I regret to inform you and your husband that for the remainder of your pregnancy and being extremely high risk you will be admitted to the hospital immediately."

"NO!!!" I scream out, sobbing......I knew it was coming and fuck if it doesn't HURT....

"I will call and EMS to transport you, and be advised that you could go into labor at any time at this stage....i am truly sorry for this. Your children from what can be told are a bit smaller than they should be, but they are strong all three." The Doctor's words, do NOT comfort me....it SHOULD that they are strong...it should....For a moment, it seems its just Ozzy and I. Ozzy holds me, as best he can. Me unable to find words....

"Mick.... oh FIREFLY." Ozzy's voice breaks. "I can feel you tremble....and...my love, you don't have to say the words.... you're 'no' said it all....at this point all we can do is hope and pray that it will be all right. I think and the Doctor wanted me to tell you.... that, tentatively they are still going to keep the c-section for April 10 or there abouts next month....though likely that could change. Ideally it was said if possible for you to be 8 months....but god....i am so fucking sorry Mick! I feel helpless and I know you feel even WORSE." I feel as uncomfortable as it is, Azalea, Les and Johanna move....i believe they are trying in their way to make me feel better.

WHY?! I've spent most of this pregnancy in the hospital, even more so than with Angel and Michelle. I hate not being there to tuck them in... i hate not being there like i feel i should be, i HATE feeling like the fucking rug has been pulled out from under me....I was for a brief moment in time, for the holidays...home...HOME and happy as I could be given the circumstances. The deck is once again stacked against me.... What about my children? What about Ozzy? And my family? Vince is a month ahead of me, he's been hard pressed to stay put....he just like everyone else wants to help and be here for me...but it kills me I cant be there for him....what if I miss his daughter's birth? Too many fucking 'what if's'. Ozzy....my beloved prince....you feel so helpless, you are sorry to put me thru this....to 'hurt' me once again...beloved husband this isn't your fault, I never truly blamed you even with the twins.....i love you....I love you....

I come back to myself and realize several things.... or am slowly coming to realize: those all too familiar beeping noises.....Ozzy, as always his Citrus and Spice scent surrounding me....him with his head down on the bed, shoulders shaking....the triplets are squirming and kicking, and I am clad at this point in what can only be described as my 'uniform' if you will and the irony is its actually FUCKING RAINING. Are the twins ok.... the triplets.... oh Oz....my Oz....

"Mick...Mick.... can you h-hear me? F-Firefly?" I manage a tearful nod, before dropping my gaze.... feeling guilty as fuck that is until my husband's warm hands tilt my face up, cradling it. "You don't have to say.... i can see and feel how bad you feel...how guilty. You've been out for quite a while...but Mick darling...NONE of this is your fault. Really.... its neither of ours. The point of my love is that we need each other more than ever now and we will get through this storm. I KNOW you didn't want to do this, breaks my fucking heart! Know that no matter what happens, I am HERE and that I love you...I love you more than words can ever say." Ozzy's eyes are filled with such love...such sorrow and that stubborn determination I love so much.

"L-Love you...Oz...Kids?" I struggle to get out.

"They are understandably upset...BECAUSE you are hurt...hurting. They do understand why you need to be here, everyone does. We will have all the support we need and then some....."He trails off before kissing me as if he's never kissed me before, I revel in it. "And..." Here Ozzy entwines our hands over my very swollen stomach. "Our three youngest here Mick, I SWEAR to you will be ok, they are strong just like you...the best of both of us and they know how very much you love them and are sacrificing for them. All five of our children know that, you are....a beyond amazing mother and partner...my heart, my world never doubt that."

"H-Home..."

"I know you wanna go home, be home...but Mick YOU are my home. You and our children." His words touch me, very much so yet I still wish I could be HOME. Even if I have apparently been out of it, I am fucking exhausted physically and mentally....just everything hurts. Ozzy sees and smooths my hair back. "I've got you...darling." HE KNOWS....doing what he can to make me feel better in some form or fashion before telling me, "Sleep Mick....and I will see you there in your dreams as you are in mine." I feel kisses on my stomach, my lips and I give into that all too familiar siren call of sleep....

It was hell, it was bitter-sweet my hospital .... perhaps it felt at the time, the most difficult. Higher stakes, more pain....i was lost, or i would have been without Ozzy and still the storm gathered strength and all of us, my family.... clung to each other even more so as much as we could. The birth though.... well, IT happened again...I DIED...or would.... brought back as I would with adrenaline straight to the heart, and in fact that is how Nikki would come to write 'Kick Start My Heart' because of my 'deaths', actually I had a hand in writing it as well.... still, the point is.... all the hell, the pain...was worth it to bring my children into this world....

A/N: Fear, pain.... the gathering storms. Next chapter will see the arrival of the triplets and their dramatic birth. The first of three parts.... stay tuned!