Gravity Falls X Reader

Soos and the Real Girl

"La, la, la, la, la!" Mabel accidentally bumps into the screendoor, getting her braces caught in it and screams. "Braces! Braces caught in the screen door! Someone dictate my will, I'm giving it all to Waddles!" She shouted. Soos walks up holding a screwdriver. "Say "ah," girl-dude." He said. Mabel opens her mouth wide. "Aaaah." Soos pries her braces off of the screen door. "Soos! You saved me!" Mabel said. "Heh, heh! Just doing my job, hambone." Soos tosses the screwdriver into his toolbelt. "I'll see you dudes tomorrow." He said. Soos opens the door and leaves. "Bye, Soos!" The triplets said. "Night, Soos." Wendy said, while playing with a Chinese finger trap. "Night, Soos." Stan said. "Doo, doo, doo, doo, doo! Walking to my car." Soos said. "You ever wonder what Soos does when he's not here at the Mystery Shack?" Mabel asked. "No." Dipper and (Y/n) said at the same time. "Not really." Wendy said. 

"Not once ever." Stan said. At home, Soos is playing a video game entitled "First Person Puncher" "Punch! Punch those leopards!" He hears the timer go off. "Oh, highlights are done!" He sets down his controller, leans over and begins taking foil out of his grandmother's hair. "You're gonna make all the other grandmas at the bingo hall so jealous!" He said. "Just a minute, m'ijo, look at this." Abuelita hands the letter to Soos. "Your cousin Reggie is having an engagement party next month." She said. Soos looks at the nvitation. "Wait, wait. Reggie is engaged? But he's like the poor man's Soos." He said. "I do not want to pressure you, but you are a man now... in a way. It's time for you to start meeting girls. I would like to see you settled before I ascend to heaven and live with the angels." Abuelita said. "And with grandpa!" Soos said. "No, he is not there." She said, looking down, then looks back at Soos. "Please find a girl to bring to Reggie's engagement, for Abuelita." She gets up off the couch and walks away. "Heh! No problem. I'm great at fixing stuff, playing video games, having a sort-of mustache." He leans back on the couch. "I could totally get a date in a week. Totally. Piece of cake." He said. "You're dead!" The game over text appears on the TV screen. "I'm dead." Soos said.

Time Skip

A child is seen walking through the Mystery Shack gift shop, flipping a coin and licking a lollipop. Stan jumps out from behind a rack of postcards. "Hello!" He shouted. The kid screams. "Please, don't let my horrible elderly face frighten you." Stan reaches over to the sheet and pulls it away to reveal Goldie. "Don't you want to use that nickel to get a nugget from old Goldie?" He asked. "Uuuuhhh..." the kid said. "Watch this!" Stan inserts a nickel into the slot in Goldie. Goldie's arm moves up and his hat raises. The arm moves down, but both of his eyes fall out while grease and smoke come out and he starts to scream. The child runs away crying. "Okay, seriously, Mr. Pines. It's time to throw that thing out. Its face reminds everyone of the inevitability of death." Wendy said. "What?! Sure, he's a little rusty around the edges, 

but old Goldie is a classic show-stopper, like me. Huh?" His hand slips on grease and lands in Goldie's mouth. Goldie holds onto his arm while he flails it around. "Aaaah! Kill it! KIIILLL IIIITTT!" Stan shouted. Meanwhile Soos is hanging up a shirt in the gift shop. Soos turns his head and notices a woman checking out a snowglobe. "Ah! A hwoman!" He dives into the middle of a shirt rack. "Alright, Soos. You can do this. Just use your mouth to say words that makes romance happen." He slowly rises up out of the shirt rack. "Your face is good. I'm a Soos!" He said. The woman screams, drops the snowglobe and runs out of the gift shop, punching a man and knocking things over in the process. Soos slowly descends back into the shirt rack, disappointed. "Soos? Are you okay?" (Y/n) asked with concern. "Yeah, Soos," Dipper pulls the shirts back to reveal Soos. "What was that all about?" He asked. "I-I think I was flirting, but I'm not sure." Soos said.

Mabel pops out of a barrel of keychains. "Did someone say flirting?!" She asked. "Well, I sort of promised my grandma I'd get a date by the end of the week, but I've never actually been on a date before." Soos grabs an out-of-order sign off of a vending machine. "You belong on me, out-of-order sign." Soos sighs. "Oh come on, Soos, don't be so hard on yourself." (Y/n) said. "Finally, my prayers for a chance to match-make this summer have been answered!" Mabel said. "Soos, a little advice. You need to get rich. Or lie about being rich. Outside of that, I don't like your chances." Stan said. Wendy scoffs. "Don't listen to Stan, dude. You're a sweet guy with a steady job and a pickup truck." She said. "Would you date him?" Stan asked. "Oh! Would you... heh... look at that." Wendy raises a magazine over her face. "Soos, you help us so much, it's time we help you, dude. We're gonna get you that date." (Y/n) said. "We're taking you where romance lives and fashion styles die. To the mall!" Mabel said.