Gravity Falls X Reader

A Tale of Two Stans

"Finally! After all these long years of waiting, you're actually here! Brother!" Stan said. Ford punches him in the face. "Oh! Ow! What the heck was that for?!" Stan asked. "This was an insanely risky move: restarting the portal! Didn't you read my warnings?!" Ford asked. "Warnings, schmarnings. How's about maybe a thanks for saving you from what appears to be, I don't know, some kind of sci-fi sideburn dimension?" Stan asked. "Thank you? You really think I'm gonna thank you after what you DID THIRTY YEARS AGO?!" Ford snapped. "What I did? Why, you ungrateful..." Stan tries to punch him but Ford ducks and grabs him. "Don't expect me to go easy on you, just because you're... family." Ford said as he slams him to the ground. "Ah!" Stan shouted. "Hey, hi. (Y/n) here. Quick question: WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE?!" (Y/n) shouted. "Stan, you didn't tell me there were children down here. And some sort of large, hairless gopher?" Ford asked. "Heh heh. I get that a lot." Soos said. "They're your family, Poindexter. Shermie's grandkids." Stan said. "I-I have nieces and a nephew?" Ford shakes (Y/n)'s hand. "Greetings. Do kids still say greetings? I haven't been in this dimension for a really long time." He said. "Nice to meet you, Uncle Ford." (Y/n) said. "Whoa, a six-fingered handshake? It's a full finger friendlier than normal!" Mabel said as he shook her hand next. "Heha, I like this kid. She's weird." Ford said. 

"I-I can't believe it. You're the author of the journals!" Dipper said. "You've read my journals?" Ford asked. "We haven't just read them; we've lived them!" (Y/n) said. Dipper began to walk in circles. "I've been waiting for so long to meet you, I-I don't know what to say I have so many questions- I," Dipper starts breathing heavily. "Oooooohhh I think I'm gonna throw up." Mabel comes over. "Hmmpf! No-no, false alarm. Hmmpf! Just gotta ride it out!" Dipper said. "Listen, there'll be time for introductions later. But first, tell me, Stan: are there any security breaches? Does anyone else know about this portal?" Ford asked. "No, just us. Also maybe the entire U.S. government." Stan said. "The what?!" Ford asked. "Fan out! We're not going anywhere till we find Stan Pines and those kids!" Agent Powers said. Ford sighs. "Okay. It's all right. We've got a while before they find this room. We just need to lay low and think of a plan." He said. "Well, it looks like we're stuck down here for a while. Who wants to tell us their entire mysterious backstory?" (Y/n) asked. "Yes, I have some questions about all this myself, Stanley." Ford said. "... Stanley?" Dipper asked. "But your name is Stanford." (Y/n) said. "Wait, you took my name?! What have you been doing all these years, you knucklehead?!" Ford asked. "Yeah, Grunkle Stan, no more lies! You owe us some answers: What's the deal with this portal? Why did you keep this a secret?" Dipper asked. "And what happened between you and your brother?" Mabel asked. "I'm hoping all this aligns exactly with my fanfic, Stan. If not, I will be very disappointed." Soos said. (Y/n) looked at Soos weirdly. "You write fan fiction?" She asked. "Yes, I love writing fan fiction." Soos said. "Okay okay okay, I know I have a lot of explaining to do. It all started... a lifetime ago... nineteen sixty something. Glass Shard Beach, New Jersey. "

~Flash back~

A seagull lands on a sign that says "GLASS SHARD BEACH-HOME OF GLASS SHARD WATER TOFFEE" and coughs up a bottlecap. "I lived with my ma and pa in the Lead Paint District in the family pawn shop." Stan's father is sitting down in a chair. "Dad was a strict man. Tough as a cinderblock and not easily impressed." Stan said. "I'm not impressed." Filbrick Pines said. "Ma was a pathological liar, which served her well as a phone psychic." Stan continued. "That'll be 99 cents an hour.... No, you're overpriced.... Yeah, I predicted you were gonna hang up." Caryn Pines said to someone on the phone. Ford as a child is reading in the top bunk of a bed. ''And then there was my nerdy twin brother, Stanford. As if his abnormally high IQ wasn't enough, he also had a rare birth defect." Stan said. An X-ray of Stanford's hands, shows the extra pinkies circled and the word "abnormality" written above six fingers on each hand. Ford is now drawing in a notebook. "Which might have explained his obsession with sci-fi mystery weirdness." Stan as a child has a bucket on his head running into a wall. "As for me, I had what mom liked to call: personality." In the flashback, Stan throws the bucket off his head and the twins laugh and run off "But as different as we were, we were the perfect team." The twins walk around in a cave. "And every day we'd wander the beach, looking for adventure." Stan said. "Whoooaa... " child Stan said. "A shipwrecked sailboat, possibly haunted by pirate ghosts!" Child Ford said. "This is the greatest thing I've ever seen! And I once saw a dead rat floatin' in a bucket!" Child Stan said. Child Ford pushes him. "Hahaha, ew, what's wrong with you?" He asked. "Huh, you know what this thing's missin'?" Child Stan asked. "Flags." Child Ford said. The twins push the boat, which has their shirts hanging off the masts, down the beach. They are both badly sunburned. "Kings of New Jersey! Kings of New Jersey! Kings of New Jersey!" Child Ford and Stan shouted. Child Ford kneels in front of the boat which has