Gravity Falls X Reader

Roadside Attraction

Grunkle Stan puts a bumper sticker on the back of his RV it that says "CAUTION: SILVERFOX AT THE WHEEL" as Soos helps pack it up. Stan hums. "Nice. And don't forget bug spray! It's perfect for spraying in the face of hitchhikers." He said. "Whoa. An RV? Camping gear? Are you running from the law again?" Dipper asked. "Dude! It's the ultimate Oregon road trip adventure!" Soos said from on top of the RV. "More like revenge trip. Every year my tourist trap competitors prank the Mystery Shack. Last year those hooligans duct taped Soos to the ceiling." Stan said. "That was a fun 78 hours." Soos said. "Well, no more!" Stan pulls out a map of Oregon's tourist traps and hands it to Dipper. "This year we're visiting every tourist trap along the Redwood Highway, and I'm gonna prank back every single one." He said. "Bow wow! Time to let the road dogs bark!" Grenda said. "That is us. We are the road dogs." Candy said. "Thanks for letting me bring Candy and Grenda along for our road trip, Grunkle Stan." Mabel said. "The more the merrier. Just sign these non-disclosure agreements. None of your parents are lawyers, right?" Stan, Candy, and Grenda walk into the RV. Soos jumps down from the roof of the RV. "What do ya say, dude? You comin'?" He asked. "I already went to the trouble of packing all your stuff. Even the stuff you kept in that secret box under the bed." (Y/n) drops the box, and pictures of Wendy come out of it. "Whoa. What the...?" Mabel asked. "Dipper, what is this?" (Y/n) asked skeptically. Dipper starts cleaning the pictures up. "Uh, nothing! Just...Wendy stuff...from old times." He said. "Ughh." (Y/n), Mabel and Soos said. "Bro, I thought you were finally past all this." (Y/n) said. "Ahh, I know, I know! I know she's not interested and I know it's over, but how do you just turn off the way you feel about someone?" Dipper asked. "Two words, Dipper. Move. On." (Y/n) said. "Yeah, dude. And a road trip's the perfect place to meet new people." Soos said. Dipper looks at a picture of Wendy, then at the pamphlet. He looks up into the sky and smiles.

Time Skip

The RV bounds across the open road. Stan is driving as Soos pants with his tongue sticking out. "Man, RVs are amazing. I can't believe we're sitting at a table in a moving vehicle!" Grenda said. "Ooh! Informational travel pamphlets." Candy presses a pamphlets to her cheeks. "I want to read them all and gain their travel knowledge. "Kid, those useless pamphlets have never helped a single person. The only wrinkly old travel guide you'll need is me. Now look alive! We're coming up on an attraction run by the most black-hearted proprietor in all of Oregon." Stan said. The RV pulls up next to Granny Sweetkin's Yarnball. "Don't let the face fool you. This woman lit my car on fire on two non-consecutive occasions." Stan said. Outside the RV, the kids have gotten out and are staring at the yarn ball. "Whoa." The triplets said. "I'm going in, girls. Waaah." Mabel goes inside the yarn. Candy laughs and follows her. "Yarn!" Grenda goes inside the yarn. A tourist girl walks by Dipper. "See Dipper? There's a new girl right there. Why don't you go try talking to her?" (Y/n) suggested. "Well, okay." Dipper said, then walks up to girl and clears his throat. "So, uh...come here often?" He asked. "No. I'm a tourist." She replied. (Y/n) face palms. Dipper laughs nervously. "You're funny. And cute. I mean, not cute. I mean, you're not not cute. Phew, let me start over." He extends a hand. "My name is Dipper." She dumps her ice cream in his hand and walks away as Dipper sighs. (Y/n) walks over to him. "It was a valid effort." She said. "Dipper, hup to! This ball a' yarn ain't gonna prank itself." Stan said over the walkie talkie. Dipper takes a piece of the yarn ball from Mabel and ties it to the back of the RV. He sighs. "Something on your mind, kiddo? You're thinking about miss cold shoulder over there, huh?" Stan asked. "Ahh, I'm so embarrassed. Look, earlier this summer I ruined my chances with Wendy." Dipper said. As they talk, Mabel and Grenda pop out of the top of the yarn ball and high-five. "Heh, yeah. Chances." Stan said. 

Mabel and Grenda begin unraveling the yarn ball behind them. "And I wanna move on, but I'm terrible at talking to girls. The moment I open my mouth around them I unravel like...like...well, I can't think of a perfect metaphor, but you get the gist. At this rate, I'm going to grow up to be a sad loner like Toby Determined." Dipper said. "Whoa. Never say that about yourself. Lucky for you I'm an expert on women. Listen to me, kid. When it comes to girls always be confident. And be funny, but not too funny. And be kinda annoying but in a lovable way." Stan said. "I don't know, Grunkle Stan. This sounds kinda jerky." Dipper said. "Hey, jerky is just a term non-jerks use to bad mouth innocent jerks. Confidence, comedy, some third word starting with a C. The three Cs of the Stan Pines dating technique! At the next tourist trap, try out my advice on the first girl you see." Stan said. "Cool. Grunkle Stan, thanks." Dipper said. "Hey, I'm full a good ideas. Speakin' of which, everyone! Now!" Stan shouted. (Y/n), Dipper, Stan, and Soos run into the RV. Mabel, Candy, and Grenda get out of the yarn ball and follow them. The RV speeds away, unraveling the yarn ball completely. "Why, you gall darn son of a no good." Granny Sweetkin takes a nail out of the ground and throws it at the RV. "I'll get you, Stan Pines!" She shouted. Later, the RV pulls up and stops at Upside-Down Town. "Ah, Upside-Down Town. The nausea capital of the state. Whatever you do, don't use the bathrooms." Stan said. The kids put on shoes with Velcro on the bottom, so they can walk on the carpeted ceiling. "Road dogs! Woof, woof, woof!" Mabel, Candy and Grenda said.