Helplessly Bound

Chapter 21

A relationship with God is the most important relationship you can have. Trust him and everything will turn out fine. — Unknown
                    

When the first raindrop fell, the siblings knew it was time to say another goodbye to their baby brother. However, barely a few minutes later, the drizzle stopped. 

Now, an hour later after leaving the cemetery, the siblings were huddled together on a bench in a park some minutes from the cemetery. 

Fola and Kala sat in the middle of the bench. On one side Marilyn rested her head against Kala's shoulder while on the other side, Emma laid her head against Fola's shoulder.  Jordan sat on the adjacent bench with dark eyes and clenched fists. 

A cloud of gloom hung over the group. Their eyes were void of tears but their hearts were heavy with pain. 

The heaviness in Fola's heart pushed her to break down into tears. However, the weight on her shoulder told her that she couldn't give in to that urge because her younger ones were looking up to her for comfort and she wouldn't let them down. Never again. 

She steeled her heart and suppressed the desire to wail.  Thoughts of the months after Kit's death filled her mind and her anger returned. Anger at herself for being helpless and unable to do anything for her brother. But most of all her fury was directed at God.  

Why didn't you listen to my pleas? She silently asked as her eyes drifted heavenward. 

Why didn't you save him from the clutches of death? Her hands curled into a fist.

Didn't you say in your holy book that we should ask and we would receive? Tears burned the back of her eyes.

 She clenched her fists tighter and gritted her teeth. Jordan broke the deafening silence but his words did nothing but fuel Fola's rage. 

"Big sis, why did God let Kit die? And Mama and Papa too."  

Fola turned to him and her eyes clouded. He stared at her with confusion shining in his eyes. 

"I don't know, Jordy," she muttered using his pet name. 

His eyes darkened and his lips formed a thin line. "It's just unfair!" he exclaimed and his jaw hardened. "I don't want to have anything to do with Him again," he gritted out.  

Same here, bro! Fola said in her mind.  

"Don't say that, Jord!" Emma shot up to an upright position and frowned. "We are nothing without God." 

Fola turned to face her with surprise rushing through her. Emma had never been vocal about her religious beliefs.

Jordan scoffed. "Please, Em, he has proved that he doesn't care about us.

"That's not true," Kala chimed in. 

It's true! Fola wanted to say but stopped herself. She was well aware of Kala's beliefs and faith and she promised herself never to condemn them even though she didn't believe in them. At least not anymore.   

Her eyes remained on Emma and she watched her with attentiveness. A smile grazed Emma's lips as she 
spoke.  

"God loves us deeply." Her eyes shimmered with conviction. 

Jordan's brows wrinkled. "I find that hard to believe because we have lost so much."

"But he has given us so much," Marilyn chimed in a quiet voice.  

Fola's amazement doubled and she blurted, "How can you be so sure?" 

A gasp sounded. 

"Big sis, don't tell me you also believe that God doesn't love us," Emma's shocked voice filled her senses.