Helplessly Bound

Chapter 24

Your birthday is the beginning of your own personal new year. Your first birthday was a beginning, and each new birthday is a chance to begin again, to start over, to take a new grip on life. — Wilfred Peterson
                  

Someone once said that one's birthday is a day to start afresh. But for Fola, every year was the same. 

She climbed out of bed and stood in front of the closed window. The view was the same as always. Thick clusters of trees surrounded her on every side. When she got married, she wondered why Chief Naade put her in a house away from civilization.  But after a few years of marriage, she understood why.  It was just to cage her. To render her helpless.  

Bile rose in her throat. She lost her freedom and identity the day she became Mrs. Folake Akande. 

Her eyes drifted to the clock and she frowned. It was almost time for breakfast and she knew Nora would come calling but she didn't want her jailer to be the first person to greet her on her birthday.  So she marched into the bathroom to prepare for the day. If she was fast enough, she could escape meeting Nora. 

After a quick shower, she slipped into her dressing room.  She scowled at the outfit Nora had picked for her. A dull grey dress hung on the hanger. Despair rushed her. She didn't expect Nora to choose anything else because, for Nora, every rule had to be followed, even on her birthday.  

She begrudgingly wore the dress and returned to the room after applying a coat of lipgloss and mascara. Birthdays were supposed to be a day of celebration but Fola found no reason to celebrate. 

With hunched shoulders, she left her room and walked down the hallway. Laugher drifted into her ears.  The laughter was so joyous she traced the sound down to a door at the end of the hallway.  She stopped in front of the open door and peeked inside. A smile graced her lips as she watched Olivia and Tobi laugh and play as they prepared for school.   

They sighted her and waved at her with excitement. She returned their greeting with as much fervor. As she gazed at them, she fondly thought of how they had bonded in the last week.  Fola thought that after their unexpected visit and Bible reading session, she would be able to gently send them away. However, she was mistaken. The two children showed up at her door every day after that.  And although she wanted to send them away, she couldn't.  

On the third day of their visit, she asked the question that had plagued her right from the start.  She asked them why they were so excited to read the Bible. They confided in her that Banke didn't read the Bible but they enjoyed it when their grandmother read it to them when they stayed with her during the holidays.  

Their confession made some buried memories resurface. As she read to them, she couldn't help but think of her childhood when her mother used to read the Bible to her and her siblings.  She also remembered the days after her mother's death when she used to read the Bible to her younger ones. 

She wondered if their coming to her to read the Bible was helping her keep the promise she made to her sister. Although she tried very hard to drain out the words while reading the Bible, some statements, 

still managed to seep into her mind. She found herself wanting to search for answers to the questions that had disturbed her for years.  But she needed help. But who could help her? Her ego stopped her from asking her sisters or Bisi for help.  And going to church still felt daunting. 

The sounds of approaching footsteps caused her heart to race and she scurried away and raced down the stairs.  A breath left her lips as she reached outside.  Her driver nodded in greeting and opened the car door. She slid inside and leaned her head back as they zoomed away.