Chris Schistad - Couldn't Ever

34

Friday, 9:21 pm

Noora took me to a little garden house behind the lake house. She turned on the light and gave me some wood. "Sooo, Carla, why did you come here?" She said. I didn't really understand.

"Because you needed help getting wood?"

"No, I mean this trip. Why did you join us?" I still couldn't follow. "Because I wanted to spend some time with my friends?" I said but it came out like a question. What was she on about?

"Who's 'my friends'?"

I looked at her in suspicion. "What is this about, Noora?" I asked. "If this is about Theo, then—"

"No, not Theo. Just answer my question." I rolled my eyes.

"You, William, Vilde and Magnus even, Eva of course, maybe even Jonas, Isak and Even. And Eskild is pretty coo-"

"What the fuck, Carla?" She said and threw her hands in the air.

"What? What is it, Noora? Cause you've been acting strange towards me since we had that— quadruple date or whatever." I accused her. I was sick of her acting strange but being mad at me for whatever reason now.

"I don't know what's going on with you, but I'm having a really good time and I don't want to fight with you, okay?"

"You forgot Chris." She simply said. "What do you mean?"

"You didn't say you were here to spent some time with him."

"Is that's what you're mad about? Noora, he's just a friend!"

"So you're friends now?!" She sounded pissed and I really didn't understand what's going on. "What do you mean?!"

"Didn't you say that you couldn't ever be friends?" She spoke fast. Then she held her hand to her mouth. "Where did you hear that from?" I said, feeling a lot more angry, betrayed even, as if Chris' and my relationship was something official, everyone but me knew about.

"Nowhere... look-"

"No Noora, you can't just say something like that. Where did you hear that from?"

She sighed heavily. "I— sometimes talk to Chris. He's over at William's often and so am I. And you know, William's his best friend so they talk about... everything. Including you."

"So? What's the problem? Why are you mad at me? What the fuck did he say that could turn my friends against me?"

"He—" she licked her lips and sighed angry. "What?"

"You're hot and then you're cold again. He doesn't know where he stands with you. You confuse him."

"Ever thought about the fact that he might be the same? I don't know what is going on between me and him, but it definitely isn't as easy as it is for you and William. So don't you judge me!"

I could feel tears sting in my eyes.

"Earlier he walked over to us and William asked him what's wrong. He pointed at you and said "She's fucking with my head." Then he left." She said.

"I saw him talking to this girl earlier in the water. Why is he mad at me if he does the same? That was our deal since day one: no strings attached. Now he's being pissed when someone does so much as bringing me a towel?"

I put the wood back on the floor and wiped a tear away with the back of my hand. "I'm— not sad, I just— uh, he's fucking with my head as well."

"You know that the girl he talked to is Iben? His ex? They broke up fighting so he probably just tried to convince her to keep things civil."

Yeah sure, that's always what's going on when a guy talks to his ex. Just friendly conversation.

I blinked a few tears away. Then I hugged her. "I don't give a damn about any guy right now, can we just not fight?"

"I'm sorry. I just wanted to understand you."

"I know." I sobbed.

"Are you guys okay in there?" I heard William say. Then he entered. "Are you alright, Carla?"

"Mhm." I nodded, and grabbed the wood. "Just had a little talk but I'm fine." Noora smiled apologetic. "I'll uh—" I coughed "Bring Theo the wood now."

Then I left them in there.

"There you are!" He said energetic but his look turned concerned then. "Are you alright?" He whiped a tear away, put my hair behind my ear and took the wood from my hand. He placed it to the rest and held my cheek. I felt uncomfortable all of a sudden, thanks to Noora.

"Nothing, I'll just uhh... warm up a bit. I'm still in a bikini, so I'll get dressed." I tried to smile and failed.

"If you need anything, tell me."

Then I left without looking at him again. I saw a few people sitting on the sofas in the entrance. I tried to quickly get in my room before anyone—

"Hey Carla, come have a drink with us!" Eskild said. Nevermind.

I licked my lips, turned around but walked backwards and away from them. "Sure, I'll be there in a few minutes. Gotta cover up, it's getting cold outside." He nodded.

Then I bumped into someone while walking backwards. Of course it couldn't have been anyone else, it had to be Chris. We held eye contact for a second before he drew his eyebrows together.

"What's going on?" He said, then grabbed my shoulders, leaned down a little and looked around angry. "Nothing,..."

"Carla, if you don't tell me what's wrong, I'll assume things that'll end up hurting someone pretty bad."

"I just— had a talk with Noora."

Immediately his grip loosened. "Oh,... did she—... what did she say?"

I licked my lips and looked on the floor. "Something like, 'So you're friends now?! Didn't you say you couldn't ever be friends?'" I laughed ironically. "I think I've heard this before." I was pissed, what else did he tell Noora and why was he acting so weird?

I then walked past him. "Carla, I—" He went through his hair with both his hands. I was already walking in my room. I'm glad that no one else was in there.

I took a really quick shower and put on my sweater and my sweatpants with thick socks so I won't catch a cold. When I opened the bathroom door to our bedroom, I saw Chris sitting on my bed.

I then laughed with a little disgust in my tone. "No."

"Carla, I don't know what she told you, but I promise, I can explain everything." He got up and moved his hands a lot while coming closer. "Please just— give me the chance to explain myself. I don't want to fight."

"You know, Chris. The problem is that no one ever tells me anything. I'm always just assuming. You want to know what she said? Fine." I was shoving him a little after every few words and then he sat on my bed.