Chris Schistad - Couldn't Ever

8

2 weeks later
Monday, 11:25 am

It was the first day I came back to school. Last week I skipped.

I was awful. Well, still am but I was doing a little better. Her funeral on Friday was heartbreaking.

When my friends asked me why I wasn't coming to school, I simply told them that I was sick and they didn't need to worry. They didn't even know my aunt so where's the point in bringing such bad news and ruining their week as well?

I was sitting with them while they were trying to hide their worried faces. I looked a mess. I put my hair in a bun today and I knew my eyes had dark circles and were swollen and red.

I didn't care tho, I just couldn't make myself look pretty so I gave up.

Last Friday, the girls had a bus meeting. I wasn't really sad I missed it. They were talking about buying our own bus but I couldn't really listen to them.

"Are you all right?", Noora asked with a concerned look while the others were focused on their conversation. I nodded and said: "I still feel a little weak but I'll be fine."

That wasn't even a lie. But I wasn't weak because of any sicknesses, I was just grieving. I held my head in my hands, my elbows on the table.

I've never lost anyone before, at least not at an age where I could understand the heaviness of death. I wasn't that close to my aunt anymore, but losing someone forever is a big deal.

"I— I don't want to make the wrong assumption... but— is it maybe because of what happened with Chris at the party? Did he say or do anything?"

I sat up straighter and I couldn't help but smile a bit at this. I shook my head.
"Why would I be sad because of him? I don't really care about him and we just hooked up. No, really it's not that."

"What is it then?", she asked and my smile dropped. "I—" I began. Should I tell her?

I decided that if there was one person I can trust with my feelings, then it was Noora because she would never judge matters of the heart and since the others weren't paying attention anyways, I started.

"I— I was feeling bad the whole week. My a—"

"Hey guys.", William said, followed by Penetrator Chris.

Noora looked at me like she wanted to say, 'I'm here for you, okay?'. And I nodded smiling. The moment was ruined. I wouldn't talk to her about it.

Then I was focusing on the food on my plate again. I knew I should eat, I just hadn't have a big appetite since... since.
I still tried to eat a little.

"Hey", Chris was now sitting next to me on the table and focussed on me. He never actually sat down beside me. I looked at him in confusion but greeted him. Acting nice now?

"So how are you doing? Heard you were sick." I wouldn't have guessed that he would even remember me, let alone notice that I wasn't at school. Why would he even care? Maybe he thinks the same as Noora? That I skipped because of him?

"I'm better now." is all I said.

"So... it wasn't because of the party on Friday? Because of what happened?" Wow.

I chuckled. "What?", he asked. I smiled at him. "Why does everybody think that I would miss school because of you? I'm sorry but you don't have such a big impact on me."

He rose his eyebrows in surprise and then wet his lips in a non-sexual way. "Yeah I thought so, I just wanted to be sure. So— No hard feelings? You know I don't do such things as feelings, right?"

Now I laughed out loud. "Yeah no. Don't worry, you're not the guy I would ever catch feelings of any positive kind for."

"Ouch. But don't be surprised when I tell you that there actually are girls that like me." I am sick of his big ego. How can he be so full of himself?

"Oh my god, congratulations on not being hated by literally everybody. Just so you know: I don't like you and I don't like you sitting next to me."

"Alright, no sitting next to me then. There is no one on my lab, so sit on me? Can sit on my face later, if you—"

Aaand asshole-Chris is back. I rolled my eyes. "You're such a cliché, you know that?"

"Maybe but the girls love it." He smirked.

"Guess I'm not a girl then, huh?" I rolled my eyes and rose my eyebrows while shaking my head. He was really getting on my nerves. How can someone be so arrogant, it's really annoying.

"You're a woman. Knowing exactly how to please a guy like me." Then he licked his lips and his eyes were on every part of my body.

I only moaned annoyed in response and looked back on my food.

"I love these sounds coming out of your mouth. Especially when it's a moan of lust or my name. Maybe you can scream it again sometime?" He suggested smirking. Oh how much I wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face.

I just shook my head in disbelief and ignored his comment. I got up and excused me. "Sorry guys but with that upcoming history exam, I gotta go study. See you later." It wasn't only an excuse to get rid of Chris, but I actually needed to do something about my bad grades.

"Yeah me too", Chris said and stood up as well. I was staring in confusion at him for a second and then rolled my eyes as I left to the library. Why was he being so clingy? We both couldn't stand each other.

I knew I was followed by Chris but I didn't care and pretended like he wasn't even there.

In the library, I placed my things on a table and went looking for the right history book. It was pretty empty in here, since no one actually spends time during school breaks in here. I didn't have school after because my English teacher was sick, so I had time.

"I can help you, if you like? I'm pretty good at history and I already did what you're doing in class right now." Chris suggested.

"And why would you do that? You're not getting anything. I'll not pay you and we're not having sex in return. Unless I want to sleep with you, and I don't, we won't."

He rose his eyebrows. "I just wanted to be nice?" He said it like a question like I was dumb to even assume that he wanted something in return.

"You're Christopfer Schistad. You're everything but nice." I said, remembering that poor girl on the toilet.

"I can be everything you want me to, Carla."

I looked at him from the side and shook my head slightly. His flirting is really starting to annoy me but I do like the way he says my name. It's somehow pretty hot— not that I would ever admit that.

He stepped closer to me and asked quietly "So what do you say?" I stared at the shelve, trying to ignore that seductive tone of his. His voice was pretty hot.

I actually could use some help with history. I know I could ask Sana, she's really good but she's also very judgmental when I don't know anything right away. She doesn't mean to and I love her, but studying with her is kind of exhausting.

"Alright, I might need some help... so why not."