Dirty Little Heart

Safe.

Beep-Beep-

It was all a blur after that. I don't remember a single bit of what happened after I was shot.. But I could hear beeping sounds all around me. And I could hear him.

"It's okay, Angelica. I'm here. I'm here. You're....you're safe now."

"You're safe."

-----

My eyes opened as quickly as possible. I looked around and figured I was in a hospital bed, laying. I move my body slowly and it felt weird because I wasn't feeling any kind of pain. I mean, I should be grateful but, who did the bullet hit then?

"Me." He says.

I look at the corner of the room to my left, where Ethan is resting. He held his bandaged hand out to show me that the bullet hit him instead.

"How?" I say. My voice was all manly and rusty.

"Well, let's just say we were there on time. The moment the door opened and when Natalia pulled the trigger, I moved you out of the way. So the bullet hit me instead of you. But somehow the gunshot affected your brain. You fainted."

"Where's Natalia?" I ask.

"She uh... she's safe, and she's being given the proper care and treatment she needs."

I try to sit up and felt disgustingly embarrassed.

"What's wrong?" He says while walking towards me and sitting right next.

"I..." I took a deep breath to gain my energy.

"I mean, all this hurt, all these...unwanted situations and deaths, only because of one fucking person. Me. I shouldn't have come here. Maybe I deserved to rot like hell before making everyone else cursed like me."

"Hey," Ethan says while cupping my face with both his hands and gazing deep into my eyes.

"Don't you fucking dare take all the blame? You got it? Don't you fucking dare! Look, I get it. Many people were hurt and there was a situation which never should have happened. But for me? The bottom line is that you're safe! That's all that fucking matters to me, Angelica. You!"

He was angry but also concerned. He truly wanted me to be safe.

"You didn't kill Rita, did you?"

My question shocked Ethan. It was an unexpected one, so it totally took him off guard. He loosens the grip and straightens himself up.

"No, Ms May, I didn't." He smiled, instantly.

"How could I kill the most valuable person in my life, Ms May? How? She was more than my universe, and I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. As harsh as it sounds, I guess we were never meant to be together."

"I still wish to be with her, but I know that can never happen. I couldn't save her, and I take all the blame."

"But you saved me," I say while staring deep into Ethan's eyes.

"You saved me, Ethan. If it weren't for you, I would have been dead myself. And I blame this on you. I.."

"Maybe we..." My eyes flutter and words popped out of my head, preventing me from forming a sentence, but Ethan knew what I wanted to say. So he acted. We both leaned into each other, filling the gap between our lips and finally melting them with each other's taste.

He cupped my cheek, and I put my hand on his thigh for support. This was the sweetest kiss I ever got from him. While the others were raw, like animals, this was at the same level of sensualness.

Finally, after a few passionate moments of eating each other, we drift apart.

"You spoil the fuck out of me, Ms May. You do."

"I'm glad." We laughed and hugged each other for some moment.

Someone knocks on the door, and we break the hug.

"Come in," Ethan says and Rick walked inside the room. He wasn't looking or acting like he did before, all creepy. He was looking like a police officer now.

"Ms May, glad to see you're awake."

"Just Angelica."

"Alright, Angelica."

"What's going on?"

"Nothing terrible, which is a far good sign. We just need your statement on how it started and everything that happened in between. Of course, when you'll get better to talk."

"Of course, whenever you're ready," I say. "But..."

"But...?"

"Can I know what...happened to...Natalia?"

Ethan and Rick exchanged looks, which were weird because these two never exchanged looks.

"What?!" I nearly shouted, eager to know what happened to her.

"Well, I guess Ethan may have told you she's getting the care she needs, that means..she's with some doctors, psychiatrist, per se. Natalia had anxiety disorder from when she was a child. It was never treated with proper care, which led to a severe type of mental health disorder."

"How do you know that?" I ask.

"Well,"

"I told him," I hear a man's voice who soon joined us in the room too. It was Natalia's father.

"Mr Polinski?! How.. I."

"Don't stress yourself, dear. God knows what you've been through."

"But how...did? How.."

"How did I survive? Well, luck. The day Natalia killed her mother, I was on a trip with my comrades. I didn't know I would come to see such horror. I always told her mother to give Natalia the proper care she needed, but she never listened, always changing the topic, always denying the fact that she wasn't well. I'm not saying that I knew this day would come, but I'm saying that I was sure of it."

"I guess...I" His voice was now trembling as if he was controlling his genuine emotions. But Mr Polinski smiled.

"I'm glad to see you doing well, dear. I pray nothing but happiness for you." He nods and smiles before walking out of the room.

I sat there, silent. It felt like someone just threw tons of metal over my head, which I'm barely holding up. I was blind till the end. I should have known. I should have.

Rick figured it was all too much for me now, so he said nothing. He gave me the space I needed for now. Ethan stayed.

I wasn't crying, nor I was feeling desperate to make things right. I was imagining how it would feel to go on a trip for a while. The soft, warm air brushed through me, maybe an ocean view, beach. I wanted to feel that.

At that moment, Ethan gets a call.

"Yeah?"

He gets up and walks over to the other side of the room, talking for a few moments and finally hanging up the call.

He looked straight at me.

"What is it?" I ask...Please don't be another issue, please don't be.

"Jonathan's awake," Ethan says.