Turning life around

The break

We've been unhappy for a while.

Him and I have been dating for almost three years, and it has never been like this. Okay sure, we've had fights, like all couples do. But never has it lasted this long. And worse, we've never been that bad with each other.

We yelled, said, and thought all kinds of insults we have learnt since kindergarden.

Tristan still stands his ground on the program thing, no matter how much I try to explain its importance to me.

And I, in return, won't budge on my position. My career is really important to me. Not only it's something I'm actually passionate about, it's the only consistent thing I can fully control. My career was all I could think about sitting in my dorm room a few years ago. I dreamt of an opportunity like this one, one that could change the game.

So what frustrated me the most was that he was just being a selfish ass. Preferring for me to stay is one thing, but getting mad that I really wanted to go is on another level. Especially since I explained the extent of the offer.

And that's not everything.

It's been months since the actual fight, but many have followed. We'd pick on each other at every tiny inconvenience. If we weren't mad we'd be distant, or simply at work. We haven't gone out on a date for what seems like an eternity, and frankly, the relationship was starting to feel really forced. The course of these four months led me to start questioning our relationship and mutual feelings.

I mean, if you really love someone, you'd want the best for them, right?
Even if it meant letting them go. And it's not like I'd be breaking up with him! It's just me being outside of the country for a while!

Now, you see I have a million reasons for what I was about to do.

It wasn't an easy decision, but I knew deeply that it was the right one.

So one day, I sat him down to a necessary talk.

He didn't know that I had bags packed in the back of my car, and I expected him to react badly. But we both took each other off-guard apparently. We agreed on taking a break, since our relationship clearly needed one.

He just sat in silence, listening to me. He never said a word, just nodded. It's only when I got up and grabbed my keys that he showed a bit of irritation.

- You're leaving today??
- Yeah. Right now, actually.
I picked my bag off the floor and headed to the door. He didn't know the location of the place I was going to, and we agreed on having no contact these two weeks.

And just like that, I stepped out of the house and closed the door behind me. I got into my car and started driving away, without even looking back.