Dear X,
What's a good way to stop a suicidal person? Well apparently making them feel like total shit is a great method. I told Tate about what happened last time I went to my sister's-not the thing I told you, this is something I didn't want you knowing-and he brought up what happened on October 11th. That was when I got drunk and FaceTimed him and his friend. We all know that I do stupid shit when I'm drunk, (examples from that night: taking off my shirt, not knowing the alphabet, calling Tate hot, etc.) but oh my fucking god this is not okay. He told me a bunch of shit and I saw him cut. When he texted this I started apologizing because I figured I said something dumb or just did nothing, but oh fucking no. I just had to fucking LAUGH and tell him to go kill himself. If you didn't believe I'm a bitch already, well here's probably one of the shittiest things I've done. Why am I such a bad person? Then he told me he'd take my advice for once. I knew I should've stopped talking to him. I just wanted to spend my last moments knowing he was okay, but he scared the shit out of me. I guess I can sorta handle him dying if I die, but he can't go first. I'm not going through that. That's too much pain. Ella had a panic attack. Katie knew Tate would stop me and didn't care. I hate him. I wanted to die. I'm a coward. I never thought I would be. People are saying he did the right thing but he didn't. It's not right. If a dog is dying and depressed do you wait for it to die and suffer or do you kill it in pity? No one has pity for me, they want me to suffer. Everyone is against me.
-Casely
